If I Should Die Before I Wake
by magicalmoments
Summary: After the great battle, Harry slips into a coma for nearly 4 years. When Harry wakes up, his memories are a blur to him, but does he want to remember? A story of how Harry readjusts to a new life and faces the one enemy left to oppose him. Will romance bl
1. Prologue

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Prologue

Jets of green, red, blue, and purple light shot through the dark night. Desperate thoughts shot through his mind… but no one could save him. He was on the ground, his legs mangled beneath him, broken… and the one person standing over him that he least wanted to be with when he died.

Lord Voldemort.

Harry Potter, the boy who lived, lay on the ground, writhing from the cruticatus curse. The curse was lifted, and he lay there panting, begging for the end in his mind, though unwilling to give his enemy the satisfaction of seeing any weakness. His vision blurred from the pain in his forehead…and in his body.

_Let it end…_he begged…_Please, let it end now…_

The Dark Lord was grinning above him. "Look at little baby Potter… your parents should see you now, you halfblood scum. Such a pitiful state, not even defending himself anymore…"

Harry looked up in hate at his sworn enemy. His vision blurred again, and he saw flashes of light in the distance, spells being exchanged by his friends and the Death Eaters. This was the ultimate battle. Dumbledore and the rest of the order were fighting their way through, desperately trying to get to Harry, but to no avail. The Death Eaters were fighting viciously. No one could save him now. The flashes of light continued… fireworks… Harry's eyes drooped in weariness of the long battle. And he smiled, for he could still enjoy his memories before he died. Fireworks.

_Flashback (the flashbacks are in italics)_

_Harry held up the Quidditch Cup in one hand, Ron in the other. It was the end of their 6th year. They had defeated Slytherin to win! The Gryffindors held a party in the common room, but as the party died down, Ron, Harry, Hermione, and Ginny sneaked outside and began shooting off little bursts of light from their wands. The fireworks exploded in the air with a light pop._

Fireworks. They are my friend's and enemies fireworks alike, Harry's alive mind told him. They are fighting the Death Ea-

_Cold. Darkness. The fireworks continued, his friends laughing whole-heartedly at their spectacular win. Harry's mind froze in its tracks. He could feel his heart beating in his chest. Then, nothing for a split second. Then the pain. His forehead was surely about to explode. In the shock, his wand fell from his grasp._

"_Harry, what's wrong?" Hermione asked uneasily._

_Harry slowly turned his head around._

_A hooded figure, clothed in black, was approaching._

_Ron and Hermione moaned in horror. Ginny seemed too terrified to speak. Lord Voldemort had come to Hogwarts. His ugly face grew closer and closer…_

Lord Voldemort, he is here! Realization dawned on Harry, he must fight! But he couldn't move…

_Screams from the school. Cruticatis spells from Voldemort to Harry and his friends… Harry managed to grasp his wand, and hexed Voldemort. "Expelliarmus!" The wand only fell from The Dark Lord's hand, he was so powerful. But as he stooped to pick it up, a huge streak of blue light hit him and caused him to fall over in shock, but not before he had cast a strange spell at Harry, causing him to lose consciousness._

Black swam before Harry's eyes. He could hear cries and shouts in the distance, and Lord Voldemort seemed to be waiting, cruelly teasing him before he died. He yelled "Crucio" at Harry over and over again… Harry could take no more, and blackness took over again…

_But as he regained consciousness, Albus Dumbledore was leaning over him, his blue eyes filling Harry with courage and strength. He had once again saved Harry and his friends…_

The face of Dumbledore motivated Harry, and as he forced his eyes open, he saw Voldemort raise his wand to deliver the killing curse. Harry forced all his effort on one word.

"Protego," he faintly whispered, grasping his wand as tightly as he could and pointed it up at Voldemort. The Dark Lord screamed, for he didn't know Harry was awake, and had been caught unawares as his own curse rebounded back at him. He went limp with shock and collapsed, dead. His wand was thrown from his hand and landed on Harry's wand. Harry screamed.

The wand had emitted a bright yellow glow that burst and spread over the entire area slowly. The Death Eaters rushed to their master to find him dead. They were nothing without the Dark Lord, and fell over and died with him.

All of Harry's senses were filled with the electrifying yellow, which soon faded into a deep, deep, black. The last thing he heard was shouts from voices he hardly recognized as he lost consciousness…

"_Harry! Harry!"_

­

This is my first fanfic. How do you like it? Please review! All input is greatly appreciated!!! Thank you!

Kelsey


	2. After the Battle

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 1

After the Battle

Hermione and Ron collapsed in exhaustion, though they were smiling weakly. Finally, the great battle had been won. Suddenly their smiles faded as they looked at each other.

"Harry!" they both whispered.

They began to walk slowly toward where they had last seen him dueling the Dark Lord. They gradually walked faster, faster, and then broke out in a run, stepping over bodies of enemies along the way. Hermione gasped and pointed to the ground.

"Professor Lupin?!" she screamed at a body lying on the ground. He did not stir. Next to Remus was the body of Lucius Malfoy, also dead. But there was a faint flicker of a triumphant smile left on the Professor's face.

Ron and Hermione sobbed together. Ron patted Hermione on the shoulder.

"L-look," he said between sobs, "He was able to kill Lucius before he - he died. Maybe he d-died happy." Hermione nodded, biting her lip in a failed attempt to stop the tears. They looked up. Draco Malfoy was standing frozen in place only a dozen or so yards away, staring at his dead father. He did not weep. He didn't even seem the least bit sad that his father was dead. In fact, the young Malfoy seemed like he was in some sort of trance.

Hermione and Ron weren't sure what to make of the Draco situation. He had been with all the other Death Eaters, but suddenly had started sending spells at theDeath Eaters. The Death Eaters were enraged to see Lucius's son betray them all. Lucius in particular was full of hate to find that his son was not following in his footsteps.

Maybe that's why Draco switched sides, Hermione thought. Only because he didn't want to obey his father's every word. So was he truly on their side? How could they know? But suddenly Draco collapsed, for he had been targeted as a traitor during the battle. Hermione gasped and rushed over to him. Ron, who was a little less trusting, followed cautiously. Hermione inspected the young Malfoy and quickly came up with what was wrong.

"He's just been hit by too many spells, even if they were spells that wouldn't cause him to faint. Many of the Death Eaters must have been enraged that he had betrayed them," she said. "Ron, I think we need to move on and trust him."

"You're right, love," he replied, "All of the Death Eaters are dead, and Draco's still here. He can't be one of them…" Ron found it hard to simply let go of all the miserable years that Draco had tormented him, his family, and his friends. All those years of being called a Weasel, all those years of nasty puns about his unwealthy family, all those years of conflict and hate between them. Every Gryffindor had figured that he was exactly like his corrupted father: a stuck-up pureblood Malfoy. But he knew that Hermione was usually right, and if she could trust Draco, then he probably should too.

Then they saw Lupin lying there again. Hermione broke into fresh sobs. Ron pulled her close and comforted her. They were close; closer than just friends. They saw McGonagall approaching.

"P-Professor McG-gonagall?" sniffed Hermione, unable to continue. She just gazed downward. Minerva gasped.

"Remus…Remus," she murmured sadly, checking for a pulse. There was none. She sighed with sorrow. To Ron and Hermione: "We'd better move on… there are many others wounded in the battle." Her voice was choked with emotion.

"Who?" asked Ron urgently. "Who else is…is…" Ron didn't want to believe it. But the ugly word forced its way into his mind: dead. Many of the members of the Order of the Phoenix must have been killed in the battle. It would be terribly hard for the wizarding world to get over grieving for their loved ones. Ron could hardly imagine if Hermione had died in the war. He would die for her. She knew that. And she would do the same for him.

Professor McGonagall ignored him, not wanting to burden them with the tragic news. She spotted Draco Malfoy lying on the ground. "Oh dear…"

"He's on our side now, Professor," Hermione said weakly. "Please, you must believe us."

McGonagall frowned. "He was all along, Miss Granger. He was a spy for the Order after Professor D-dumbledore…" she couldn't go on. "After he convinced Draco not to follow his father." She whispered, overcome with emotion.

"What's wrong, Professor?" Ron asked worriedly.

"Nothing," she replied swiftly, changing the topic. "We must come back for Remus later. Right now I must go back to see someone."

Ron and Hermione trudged forward, looking for anyone they knew.Ron was desperate to locate everyone in his family. They heard moaning coming from the ground not far away. Soon enough they found out who it was.

"Lavender, are you alright?" asked a fearful Hermione.

"I don't think so. Please get help!" she moaned again. Ron gasped and pointed to her leg. There was blood seeping from a wound that was oddly shaped like a circle.

"Lavender, were you shot?" Hermione asked, losing her head completely.

"Shot?" she asked fearfully. "What are you talking about? All I know is some f---in d--- b---- of a Death Eater sent this purple circle hurtling at me and I couldn't dodge it."

"I'm so sorry Lavender. Guns are only in the Muggle World," Hermione said. "Ron, please go get Professor McGonagall quickly! I'll stay with Lavender."

Ron nodded and dashed off. Hermione held Lavender's hand to help her through the pain. McGonagall and Ron were soon hurrying back. Minerva shooed Hermione and Ron away and dealt with Lavender.

Ron pointed in relief at two identical redheads sitting with their backs leaning against a rock. Fred and George were safe and appeared hardly injured.

"Oi, Ron, Hermione," they called out without their usual spunk. They were exhausted. "Glad to see you two okay," Fred said with such weariness that Hermione was concerned.

"Yes. We were bothworried sick. Have you seen Mum, Dad, or anyone else?" George asked, dreading any ill news he might hear.

"Not yet," Ron replied. We're looking for everyone, but especially Harry. Want to join us?"

The redheads nodded. George stood up, then offered to help Fred up. He pulledFred up slowly and carefully. That's when Ron and Hermionerealized that something was wrong.Fred's shin looked horribly thin, like it was twisted the wrong way. Ronstared at Fred's shin, and Hermione paled.

"Why didn't you tell me something was wrong?" she asked. "I think I can help."

Hermione muttered a spell, and Fred's shin seemed to find it's place again, butthere wasstill a glaring red gash there. Hermione sighed.

"You're hurt pretty bad, Fred. You'll need to go to St. Mungo's as soon as possible."

George nodded. "I tried to tell him, but-"

Fred cut him off. "Uh, alright then. George, can you apparate us to St. Mungo's? I'mfeeling a bit weak."ThenFred put his hand onGeorge's shoulder andthey both disappeared.

Ron and Hermionemade their way toward the center of all the fighting. Hermione let out a silent scream and shuddered. A black cloak was lying on the ground, shrouded in a black mist of evil. The remains of Lord Voldemort.

Ron held Hermione's hand to comfort her as much as to comfort himself as they approached. They saw a boy sprawled on the ground next to the cloak, and Hermione began to scream.

"Harry! Harry!" she screamed, sobbing frantically while Ron stood there in shock. Finally he took action.

"We've gotta get help," he said shakily. "I can feel his heart beating slowly…" he told Hermione to stay here while he went and found somebody. She nodded, but whimpered at the sight of the dark cloak only a few yards away.

"Hurry," she whispered.

"I will." They embraced in an attempt to force the desperate thoughts from their minds. Harry - dead, lying on the ground in a heap... No. Hermione wouldn't let the thoughts enter her mind. She finally let go of Ron and he hurried to find someone; anyone. Hermione slowly sat down next to Harry as her lip quivered.

"Harry… Harry… come back to us," Hermione said softly.

A voice behind Hermione startled her. "Hermione?" the voice asked.

It was Ginny. Hermione couldn't break Ginny's heart and tell her that her boyfriend might die any minute. She just couldn't.

Ginny knelt down by Hermione. When she saw Harry's mangled body she gasped in shock and horror. "No," she whispered. "Harry?" Silent tears flowed from her face as she put her face in her hands. It broke Hermione's heart.

"He's-he's n-not dead," Hermione said. "N-not yet." This caused Ginny to cry harder, thinking of all the suffering he had gone through.

She stroked his hair gently. He had never deserved this. He had never deserve to have his parents killed. He had never deserved to grow up with a cruel aunt and uncle. He had never deserved to face Voldemort again and again, and he had never deserved to be forced to defeat the Dark Lord. Harry didn't deserve any of the hard times in his life. No one deserved this.

Only Harry Potter, the boy who lived, could defeat the Dark Lord to fulfill the prophecy. But why him? It wasn't fair. Ginny would have willingly sacrificed herself; object herself to some of the pain; take an edge off of the suffering for him. She wished she could have his scar, the pain, and the terrible memories. Ginny had just confessed her love to him 4 days ago, and he admitted his love for her. They were a couple. But now, what would become of it? Could he make it? Would he survive?

They would have to wait.

Ron was returningwith others. Maybe there was hope.

They would have to wait.

But no one knew that they would have to wait three, long, years.

No one knew.

Is this too short? Sorry the prologue was so short too. Please give me feedback! I promise I'll try to keep the chapters longer!

Kelsey


	3. Deep Darkness

Chapter 2

Deep Darkness

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything! The characters are JK Rowling's and no one else's!_

_----_

"_He's here! It's him!"_

"_Lily, grab Harry and go. I'll try to fight him off…"_

_Screams._

"_Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!"_

"_Step aside, you foolish girl… step aside now!"_

"_Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead-"_

"_Avada Kedavra!"_

_A shrill scream. Silence._

_A pair of cold eyes staring at him._

_The wand raised._

_And lowered._

Then blackness again. Harry's mind replayed memories through his head. Then blackness in between.

_He stared into a mirror. Something cold and hard was in his hand._

_The man removed his purple turban and slowly turned around._

_The other face jeered at him._

"_Join me now… or face your parents fate."_

_Two familiar faces in the mirror…they faded._

"_I'll never join you."_

"_Kill him!"_

_The man with two faces launched himself at him. _

"_Ahhh!"_

"_Kill him, you fool!"_

"_His hands, they burn!"_

"_AHHHH!"_

_The figure crumbled to the ground. Silence._

_Silence._

_The stone glinted at him._

_Silence._

_A strong wind penetrated him, freezing him, going through him. _

_Lord Voldemort escaped._

Blackness. Then, a cold, wet floor was beneath him.

"_Kill the boy."_

_A menacing hiss. _

_Fawkes. Fawkes, help me._

"_Look what Dumbledore sends little Potter. A hat, and a silly bird."_

"_What?"_

_A hiss full of pain._

"_Ahh. The basilisk may be blinded, but it can still hear you!"_

_Through the pipes. Slithering toward him. Trapped._

_Trapped._

_No way out._

_Everything was a blur. He somehow made it out._

_Out of the pipes. To face it._

_The sword was in his hand. _

_Into its mouth. A desperate hiss._

_It was dead._

_Its fang had found its target._

_His arm was bleeding and poisoned._

_The girl with red hair woke up._

_Who was she?_

_Who…_

The deep darkness has taken him again. He was in an old shack.

_The dog growled._

"_It's not a dog. Harry it's a trap! He's the dog…he's an Animagus!"_

_A trap._

_He was fooled._

_Anger._

_He killed my parents._

_Traitor._

_His wand soared away from him._

_The explanation._

_The story._

"_I believe you."_

_The shock._

_My godfather._

"_We must go."_

_A howl._

_Full moon._

"_Professor Lupin?!"_

_A howl._

_A dog fought the werewolf._

_A faraway howl. _

_The werewolf ran away._

_The dog became a man._

_Who was the man?_

_Who…_

_Dementors everywhere._

_Sucking out his soul…_

_A glow in the distance._

_They were saved…_

Complete blackness came again. It then became black as night.

"_Avada Kedavra!"_

"_Expelliarmus!"_

_The connection._

_The vibrating._

_You mustn't let go._

_A boy his age appeared._

_Then a muggle._

_Then a witch._

_Next two familiar faces. They told him what to do._

_Running._

_The portkey. _

_He grabbed the boy his age._

_A jerk._

_Hogwarts. They were back._

The quidditch field faded into utter darkness. Then, into a room.

_The pain._

_His forehead._

"_Master, I'm sorry! I didn't know he smashed the prophecy!"_

"_It's no use. He can't hear you!"_

_More pain._

"_Can't I, Potter?"_

_Lord Voldemort._

_He was helpless. _

_The statue. Saving him._

_He was saved by a wizard with a white beard and blue eyes._

_The duel._

_Statues protecting the wizard._

_Fawkes._

_Voldemort disappearing._

"_Stay where you are, Harry!"_

_The pain._

_White knives on his forehead._

_Dread._

_He was trapped in the coils of a snake._

"_Kill me now, Dumbledore. If death is nothing, kill the boy."_

_Pain beyond anything._

_Let it end. Kill me now. I'll be with my family again… _

_Then he was back._

_A snake no longer._

_The wizard looking at him with compassion._

_Who was he?_

_Who…_

The blue eyes stared at him for a while, troubling him deeply. They were important…he must remember. But then darkness took over.

Then his sixth year encounter played back in his head.

Thus every year he had dreamed but his seventh.

He never dreamed of it.

Not for 3 long years.

He couldn't remember.

He didn't know if he wanted to.

---

Please review! This chappie was hard to write. Too confusing?

Kelsey


	4. A Loud Awakening

Chapter 3

A Loud Awakening

_Disclaimer: I own nothing! The characters are JK Rowling's._

_---_

The nurse went in to check on her patient. But he wasn't just any patient who was in a coma. He was Harry Potter.

He had fallen into a coma a bit over 3 years ago after the great battle. They knew he could die at any minute. The chances of him awakening after 4 years were very slim, so everyone was pulling for him during his last year of greater odds.

Still, the odds were 1 to 4 that he would wake up. After 4 years, however, the odds decreased rapidly. The 4-year mark dropped the odds to 1 to 10. Then each year thereafter dropped by another point. 1 to 11. 1 to 12. After 10 years, it was almost considered a lost cause to have hope with someone waking up.

Ron, Hermione, and Ginny had never lost hope. They didn't care what the odds were. Odds were worth ignoring; hope was more important. They visited every week, speaking to Harry as if he could hear them.

As the nurse, Anne, tended to Harry, she sighed heavily. The poor boy. He wasn't really a boy anymore. Harry had grown to a tall, handsome man. The one thing that remained the same was his sparkling, emerald green eyes. She never tired of tending to him. It was an honor to care for the Boy Who Lived… but she couldn't help but think that maybe he wouldn't live this time. The odds were against him.

Anne checked for a pulse. She had always been instructed to do this every day for patients that were in a coma, though she hated it. It was as if everyone was waiting for them to die at any minute. Then she took his heart rate. Anne frowned. It was higher than usual. His heart had been beating at the same, slow pace for about 2 years now. The 1st year had been a bit faster beat, slowly decreasing to this speed.

This was weird, and Anne didn't know what to make of it. She was about to go talk with a specialist in heart rates when she thought she saw his finger twitch. She was scared. Was he having a seizure? Usually patients in a coma died of their heart slowing down too much. Was Harry's heart going to speed _up_ too much?

She walked quickly down the hall.

"Doctor Flannigan! Please come quickly!" He followed her without hesitation, for her knew that she took care of Harry Potter.

"What is it, Anne?" he asked urgently.

"Harry's heart rate has been the same slow rate for 2 years. Now it has sped up slightly. Is something wrong?"

The Doctor gasped. "There are two possible things: polar opposites. One: Harry's heart is giving out. Or two: he is waking up."

Anne drew in a breath sharply. "I thought I saw his finger move."

Doctor Flannigan smiled. "Then I think our patient is waking up."

Anne was shocked. In a happy way, of course. They watched Harry for 10 minutes attentively. Then, Anne cried out.

"Did you see what I saw?" Anne asked excitedly.

The Doctor grinned. "His eye twitched. Yes I saw it."

In another 3 minutes, Harry was wiggling his fingers. Anne bit her lip. This was it. In less than an hour, the Boy Who Lived would wake up. She wondered what he would have to say.

All of Harry's friends had been informed that he could wake up soon. Within 5 minutes Hermione and Ron had apparated by his side. Only Ginny had gotten there sooner.

And at 3:34 p.m., Harry James Potter opened his eyes to a group of well-wishers. He blinked heavily a few times before taking a deep, shuddering breath. Then he opened his mouth, but no sound came out. He looked very confused and disoriented, as anyone who wakes up from a coma would.

"W-where, what-" he croaked, licking his lips and feebly clearing his throat. He had not talked for almost 4 years. "Water," he begged.

Anne went and quickly fetched water. He drank it gratefully.

"Blimey, what is going on?" Harry asked weakly.

Hermione and Ginny had tears in their eyes. They were so shocked and happy that Harry was awake. Ron appeared to be blinking furiously, as if not allowing the tears out. No one spoke, as if they were assuming that someone else would explain everything. Finally, Professor McGonagall spoke up.

"Mr. Potter, you have been in a coma for nearly 4 years," she said seriously. Harry's eyes widened in shock. He looked around the room disbelievingly, but nobody denied the statement.

Harry had only one thing to say. "Bloody hell," he croaked, a sarcastic smile spreading across his face. Light chuckles were heard throughout the room. Suddenly a flash went off. Reporters had come.

Harry frowned. Anne was furious. Harry had just woken up to a room full of friends. Now some dumb reporters were going to spoil the occasion? She thought not.

"OUT!" Anne screeched. "GET OUT! REPORTERS, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! RIGHT NOW!"

Harry closed his eyes and put a hand to his head. The yelling was giving him a headache. Flashes were still going off from reporters as Anne forced them out. She closed the door quietly, trying not to disturb Harry any more than she already had.

"I'm sorry, Harry," she said apologetically. "I just got riled up."

"S'okay," Harry murmured sleepily.

Anne had an idea. "How about we let Harry relax until tomorrow and then anyone who wants to visit individually or in small groups can talk with him? I don't want to tire him out, he might fall into a coma for another week or two." Everyone nodded in assent. They filed out quietly. Harry fell asleep instantly under Anne's careful watch. Fortunately he did not slip back into a coma.

This time Harry's dreams were more peaceful. He could not remember what the memories from his coma were. They had slowly slipped away from him, and now all he knew was that they were very unpleasant. Maybe he didn't want to remember.

In these dreams, he remembered wonderful memories, but to his great frustration, he could not recall who the people were in them.

_A friendly, freckled, redhead and him were opening presents on Christmas Day. _

_Suddenly the boy spotted a long, thin package lying underneath the other presents. "What's that?"_

_He ripped open the package to reveal a Firebolt._

_A firebolt. The fastest, best, most expensive broom out there. The same broom he had went to see every day at Diagon Alley._

_And it was his. _

"_I don't believe it," the boy said. "Who sent it to you?"_

_There was no card. Whoever it was from didn't even send a card! _

_Thoughts raced through his head… Was it Dumbledore? Lupin? No, Dumbledore couldn't favor students like that. And Lupin? Sure, he seemed to like Harry, but if he had _that _much money then he'd buy himself some new robes._

_The redhead grinned. "Wait till Malfoy sees you on this! He'll be sick as a pig!"_

_They laughed. The redhead mimicked a look of shock and horror on his face and Harry tried to recall who they were talking about._

_Who was Malfoy?_

Harry was still in happiness. Who cared about some Malfoy character. He had a firebolt! It was his! His thoughts moved onto another dream.

_Everyone around was laughing. Two redheaded twins apparently had pulled a huge prank. He was laughing too. _

_A portable swamp was everywhere!_

"_So…you think it amusing to turn a school corridor into a swamp, do you?" a sickly sweet voice said._

"_Pretty amusing, yeah." One redhead said fearlessly. _

_Then an ugly, dirty man arrived with the 'Approval for Whipping.' The woman smiled evilly. _

"_You two are about to learn what happens to wrongdoers in my school."_

"_You know what? I don't think we are." One twin said. "I think we've outgrown full-time education." _

"_Yeah, I've been feeling that way myself," the other replied._

"_Accio Brooms!" A loud crash came from the distance, and two brooms soared into the twins' grasp. _

"_Won't be seeing you," a redhead said to the woman, who's triumphant grin had faded._

"_Yeah, don't bother to keep in touch."_

_They went on to describe their shop in Diagon Alley and that students would get discounts if they used the tricks to get rid of 'this old bat' (the woman)._

"_STOP THEM!" the women shrieked._

_It was too late. The twins had mounted their brooms and flown towards the door. But not before their last words:_

"_Give her hell from us, Peeves."_

_And then they were gone, amid tumultuous applause._

Harry smiled in his sleep. But his smile faltered as he tried to recall who the redheads were… who? They were more important than the other boy he'd tried to remember, he just knew it.

"_Harry?"_

"Harry?" He wasn't dreaming anymore. Harry awoke to a nurse's face. She was gently shaking his shoulder.

"Hello.. erm…?"

"I'm Anne. I've been taking care of you, Harry, while you were sleeping."

Harry smiled. "Well, uh, thanks. That was very kind of you."

Anne smiled back. "How are you feeling? Do you want to sleep some more, or are you ready to see your friends?"

Harry thought about that, then grinned. "I reckon I've done enough sleeping to last me the rest of my life."

Anne laughed. "Alright then. I'll send them in."

"Okay."

Anne turned around. "But, Harry, listen. Things… well, things have changed while you were sleeping. If you feel overwhelmed, that is normal. I'm sure everyone will help you through it. But, if you are not ready, we understand."

Harry nodded.

"Are you sure, Harry? Do you really want to know everything?"

He nodded again determinedly. "Yes. I'm ready for the truth. I want to know everything."

He sat up in bed and awaited his first visitor.

---

Sorry if the coma information about heart rates isn't accurate. I'm not an expert. So, what do you think?

Kelsey


	5. Visitors

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 4

Visitors

_Disclaimer: Only the plot is mine. None of the characters belong to me. They are JK Rowling's property._

The door slowly creaked open. Surprisingly, it was not one of Harry's best friends. It wasn't even Hagrid or Dumbledore.

It was Minerva McGonagall. She smiled at Harry.

"I know you are probably wondering why I am your first visitor, Mr. Potter," she said swiftly. "But there are some things that you should know. Are you ready? This will not be pleasant."

Harry bit his lip. "I'm not sure. Could I just visit with everyone first? Then if I want to know, you can tell me everything?"

His former Professor sighed. "That is just it, Harry. Some people won't be here to visit you, and soon enough you shall realize it. That, and only that, is what I am here to tell you. You will learn of it eventually, I just thought it might be easier for you to know what really happened, rather than let your mind wander and come up with horrible possibilities; though the truth is horrible too."

Harry could not meet her eye. He stared at his bed. Finally, he spoke. "Professor, whi-"

"Oh, Mr. Potter," interrupted Minerva, "You need not call me Professor anymore. I am no longer your teacher."

"Then you need not call me Mr. Potter anymore," Harry replied with a grin. "Let's talk from friend to friend."

"Alright. As you were saying, Mr. – erm, Harry?"

"Well, while I was sleeping, I dreamed of many horrible things. I couldn't even remember who some of the people were in my dreams. But now, I can recall them better. I just don't understand something." Harry sighed. I guess I can wait to ask Dumbledore about it."

"Well, you couldn't see him anyway. He is… not here. Albus is far away. I'm sure you'll see him again eventually. Anyway, I'm sure anything that happened while you were asleep can be explained to you later. I'm sorry, if you'll excuse me Harry, I think I have something in my eye."

Harry frowned slightly as she hurried out. Had he offended her by clearly saying Dumbledore could help him and she couldn't? Just then, two faces emerged as the door opened again.

"Ron? Hermione?" he asked, overjoyed. They had changed so much! Harry could hardly remember that these were his friends over 3 years ago. They were beaming though, and looked very happy to see him.

"Harry, you're awake!" cried Hermione happily. "It's been so long…"

"Hey Harry," Ron said. "We missed you."

"We came here every week to see you. It was hard, Harry. Everything seemed out of place with you gone. On the holidays we came too. Your presents are still here," she said, fighting tears.

Harry glanced at where she was gazing. He smiled. A huge pile of candy was heaped by the wall, surrounded by other wrapped presents. On a small table by his bed, there were many cards from his friends, and anyone else who wanted to wish their hero a speedy recovery.

Ron held Hermione's hand encouragingly. That's when Harry saw the diamond on Hermione's finger. Could it be true?

"Congratulations!" Harry said, beaming at them. "I can't believe I've missed my best friends' wedding…"

"Oh, no you haven't, mate," Ron replied with a grin. "We just got engaged almost 2 months ago. The wedding is in a few weeks."

Harry was startled. "I've missed so much," he whispered. "So many things have changed."

Hermione shook her head. "Well, yes, I suppose they have. But one thing never changed; we will always be friends, Harry, no matter what."

They grinned at each other. The trio was back together again.

"So, tell me about your lives," Harry said. "What has happened while I've been rotting in this hospital bed?"

Ron laughed. "Well, we both considered becoming Aurors. But we knew that the Dark Days were pretty much over, so we figured that career wouldn't last more than several years."

Hermione took up the story. "I'd always wanted to help others learn. I work at Hogwarts. I'm the Muggle Studies professor. I also manage the library."

Ron smiled proudly at his wife. "She's a hard worker, my Hermione," he teased her.

"Oh, stop that, you," she playfully scolded Ron. They stared at each for a second, then Harry cleared his throat to bring them back to reality.

"Oh, erm, yes Harry," Hermione said, turning slightly red. "So, Ron, tell Harry what you do."

"Well, first I worked at the Ministry part-time for about a year. Then, the new headmaster at Hogwarts offered me to help out the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. I missed Hermione so much, so of course I accepted." Ron said.

"The Dark Arts professor is a bit frazzled," Hermione explained. "She gets stressed out really easily, so sometimes Ron gets to teach lessons by himself."

"Half the job is just grading exams, though," Ron admitted. "But I get to do a lot of demonstrations and teaching too."

"Oh, that's great, Ron," Harry finally got a word in. "And Hermione, too. That's great you get to work together, in a way. What did you say about a new headmaster? Dumbledore resigned?"

"Well, not formerly, I guess," said Hermione nervously. "He's resting."

Harry was about to question her further when there was a gentle knock on the door. Anne stepped inside.

"You two have been in here for nearly half an hour!" she exclaimed. "I think you should let someone else see Harry."

Harry was strongly reminded of his stays in the Hogwarts hospital wing, when Madame Pomfrey always shooed visitors out quickly.

"Of course," both Ron and Hermione replied.

"We'll come to see you tomorrow," Ron assured him.

"Bye, Harry!" Hermione said, and they both left the room.

Fred and George entered next. The only way Harry recognized them was their red hair, and that they looked alike.

"Harry!" one said.

"Nice to see you awake," mentioned the other.

"Alright, alright," Harry said. "I need to know who's who first."

"He's Fred, I'm George," said the twin on the left.

"No, I'm George, you're Fred," said the twin on the right.

"Oh stop it, you two," Mrs. Weasley said as she entered. "This is Fred, on the right, and George, on the left."

"Aw, Mum, why'd you spoil all the fun?" said George.

"Just coming in to check on you. Harry, don't eat anything they give you! It's probably some horrid trick from their shop."

"Thanks for the warning, Mrs. Weasley," Harry said politely, though stifling laughter as he saw the twins rolling their eyes and making faces behind her.

"Oh, Harry, I hardly know what to say," she said. "We've been waiting for you to wake up for what seems like forever… we'd so glad you're back!"

"Yeah, well we just came by to say hello," George said.

"Hope you're out of that bed in no time, mate," Fred said.

"I daresay you've spent enough time in it," George said.

"I'm sorry, Harry, but we have to leave," Mrs. Weasley said apologetically.

"G'bye, Harry."

"Cya Harry."

The twins waited until Mrs. Weasley left, then slipped a bag by his bed.

Fred winked. "Nothing harmful, don't worry. They've all been tested loads of times."

George laughed. "They're a big hit in the shop right now. They don't make you sick or anything like that."

Harry chuckled. "You'd better leave, before your mum-"

"FRED! GEORGE! Get out of there this instant. You'd better not be giving him anything suspicious…" Mrs. Weasley screeched loudly.

They hurried out of the room, muttering their last goodbyes. Another Weasley stepped tentatively into the room.

It was Ginny. Harry was surprised at how much she had changed, too. She was still beautiful. Her red hair fell so beautifully in front of her shoulders, and swished back and forth as she walked. She had grown, too; not just in height. Then she smiled, and Harry was filled with happiness at her gorgeous smile. He wanted her so much.

Then suddenly his heart sank. It had been three years. What if she was already with someone else? At school he had been about to admit his love to her… but he couldn't really remember. Everything before he fell asleep was a blur. How had he gotten into his coma anyway? He could hardly remember.

"Hi Harry," she said quietly. She sat on the edge of his bed.

"Ginny…" he said, gazing into her eyes. If only he could tell her how he felt about her. But what if she didn't feel the same way about him? He would be crushed.

"I've missed you so much," Ginny whispered.

"I've missed you. More than you know," he blurted out, suddenly realizing his mistake. He turned red.

Ginny frowned slightly. "Harry, I've always loved you. You knew that, didn't you? That day in the courtyard… you meant everything you said, didn't you?"

It was Harry's turn to frown. "Day in the courtyard? When?"

Ginny looked shocked. "At Hogwarts, Harry. Five days before the battle."

Harry wracked his memories. He concentrated fiercely, trying to retrieve the memory. It would not come.

"I-I'm sorry, Ginny," Harry said confusedly. "I can't remember. What battle? Did we get in a fight?" Harry asked, panicking.

It was then that Ginny knew something was seriously wrong. The color drained from her face.

"You don't remember the great battle?" she asked so quietly, that Harry had to strain his ears to hear.

Harry was frightened by her scared expression. "Erm, no. So this 'great' battle was important, I guess."

"Yes," said Ginny, barely audible. "Yes, it was."

"Ginny, please," Harry begged, "explain it to me."

Ginny froze. "I'm not sure if I should be the one to tell you that, Harry…"

"Please, Ginny. Everyone is telling me that things have changed. I want to know everything. I am tired of being in the dark… literally. I want to remember. I want to understand." Harry said firmly.

Ginny was deep in thought. She still hadn't said a word.

"But then why won't you tell me? You're closer than just a friend to me. I don't care about how you feel about me back. The truth is, I love you Ginny. I can't imagine life without you." Harry sighed. "Look, I would have Dumbledore explain everything to me, but Hermione said he took a journey far away. Who knows when he'll return. Who else could tell me? Sirius is gone. My parents are gone. I guess I could ask Remus…" Harry said thoughtfully.

Ginny slowly turned to face Harry, though she could not bear to look him in the eyes.

"Dumbledore and Remus arrived at the same faraway place 3 years ago, Harry. That is their home now. I'm sure they are quite happy there. We will never forget them, and we will see them again when our time is up."

Harry puzzled for a moment, wondering why Ginny was wording her statement so oddly. Then, suddenly, he understood.

He slowly turned his head up toward Ginny's and looked into her eyes, wanting, _begging _for this to not be true.

"I'm sorry," she said before breaking his desperate gaze. She broke down completely. The tears flowed from her eyes and dropped onto Harry's bedspread.

Harry stared down at the blankets. "No," he whispered.

Harry stared at the comforter, taking in every detail of the pattern. Red diamonds, surrounded by blue circles, with green triangles scattered everywhere…

Seconds turned into minutes. He was hardly aware of time; he hardly noticed when Ginny got up and left the room.

Minutes turned to hours. Harry refused to see anyone.

After a few hours of staring at that comforter, Harry's head dropped onto the pillow in exhausting thoughts and grief.

---

Ginny exited the hospital room in tears. She saw Ron and Hermione sitting on a bench down the hall. They looked up as they heard her footsteps and they saw her tears.

"Ginny, what's wrong?" asked Hermione as soon as she realized the tears weren't from happiness.

"I told him. He knows," she cried hysterically.

"Ginny, calm down. What did you tell Harry?" Hermione said in a soothing voice.

Ginny took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I told him about D-dumbledore, and-and…" she could not continue.

"Remus," Hermione sighed.

"What'd you go doing that for?" Ron asked angrily. "I thought we agreed not to!"

Ginny's lip quivered. "Ron, I'm _sorry_. He just kept bringing it up and I couldn't avoid the subject anymore. I couldn't keep lying. He would have to find out sometime, okay?!"

Ron forced his anger out of his mind. "Look, Ginny, I'm sorry for losing my temper. But you really shouldn't have told him, okay? Believe me, Harry is not going to take this very well. Dumbledore and Remus were the last two people Harry was close to. His parents died, Sirius died, and now he just found out Dumbledore and Remus are dead. Who can he turn to now, Ginny?"

Ginny looked at him with a twinkle in her eye despite her tears. Ron raised an eyebrow. Hermione cleared her throat as if to ask permission to reenter the conversation.

"Yes, Ginny, he will need you. But he needs a loving adult; someone who would be like a parent to him. His real parents are gone, then his godfather, and now the last 2 people who have been like a father to him. And his aunt and uncle are thoughtless prats."

"Well, I imagine Mum would take him in, wouldn't she, Ron?" asked Ginny hopefully.

Ron smiled. "Of course she would, Ginny. She always had been willing to, though Harry had to stay with those worthless gits. Honestly, of all Muggles, they are the worst…"

Ginny suddenly paled again. "Guys, there's something else, something else about Harry."

She took a deep breath. "He doesn't remember some things…"

Hermione showed her book-wormy self. "Well, of course! Amnesia is common after prolonged comas. Don't you worry, Gin, it is completely normal for Harry to forget bits and pieces of his life. I read that in… oh, what bloody book did that come from? Was it-"

Ron quickly cut in, "It's alright Hermione. Chances are us lower beings haven't read it anyways, besides-"

It was Ginny's turn to interrupt, though Hermione was giving Ron a look. "Hermione, I'm serious, this is not normal. He can't remember the great battle. He can't remember… us."

Ron and Hermione looked shocked. "You mean, he doesn't remember that you love him?" Hermione whispered.

Ginny's eyes were welling up. "I don't think so. He said, 'You're closer than just a friend to me. I don't care about how you feel about me back.'"

Hermione sighed in despair. Ron looked at the both of them, then spoke.

"I know this is a tragic girl moment and all, but I think that the great battle is just as important. You say he can't remember the battle?"

Ginny nodded. "When I mentioned the battle, he thought it was a fight between us or something. I felt horrible."

Ron nodded. "This is going to be harder for him than I thought. We need to explain the great battle to him as soon as possible."

Hermione nodded in agreement. "Yes, we do."

Ginny nodded reluctantly. "He _does_ need to know… but I'd rather not be the one to tell him, if you two understand. I don't want to be known as the bringer of bad news or something."

They sat in silence for a few minutes, and Hermione rested her head on Ron's shoulder. Just then, someone else came down the hall.

"I hear that he has woken up," he said.

"Yes, but I'm not sure you should see him just yet," Hermione said warningly.

The man nodded. "I know. Harry would not have seen me in the battle. He might not be pleased to see me."

Ginny spoke up softly. "He doesn't even remember the battle."

The man looked shocked. "Pardon?"

"You heard her," Hermione whispered.

"Blimey. Well, I think you lot need a breath of fresh air," the man said. "Maybe you could explain a few things to me."

The others nodded. As the four friends walked by Harry's room, they saw him still staring at the comforter intently. Ginny burst into tears.

"What's wrong with Harry?" the man asked.

"He knows about Remus and Dumbledore. He's been staring at that damn bed for a couple hours," Ginny replied with a mixture of emotions. She felt very sad, then angry that she had told him.

"Believe me, I have gone through the loss of my father in the battle," the man said sympathetically, "though I did not grieve, as you know. The initial shock seemed to paralyze me."

"Yes, we were there, Draco."

---

Draco's back in the story! Yipee! Don't worry, he is a good boy now. So if you hadn't picked up on all the hints before, yes, Dumbledore is dead. You'll find out how… don't worry! Thanks to my reviewers! Luv ya!

Kelsey


	6. Explanations

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 5

Explanations

_Disclaimer: The characters in this story were created by JK Rowling, not me. _

---

_How do you pick up the fragments of an old life? How do you go back to the way things were, when in your heart, you know… there is no going back. Some scars are too great; some wounds run too deep. _

_Frodo Baggins, Lord of the Rings_

_---_

Harry lay in his hospital bed, sleeping in exhaustion from his grief. He had just found out that Remus and Dumbledore were dead.

Not one tear had fallen from his bright emerald eyes. Not one drop had splashed onto the bedspread.

When Hermione expressed her concern of his lack of emotions to Anne, she just nodded knowingly.

"I won't tell you that everything is okay, Hermione," said Anne, "because it's not. He is in a deep shock right now. It might take him days to truly realize and accept what has happened."

The four friends each had different opinions on how to break the rest of the news to Harry.

"We should wait a while before we tell him anything else," Ron explained. "I mean, look how shocked he was this time… we should tell him something new once a week to allow him time to adjust."

Draco looked as if this was a bad idea. "That's horrible! Then he'll be depressed for a month! Best to get all the news over with at once, then he'll be alright after a few days…"

Hermione seemed to agree with Draco. "No offense, Ron, but I like Draco's idea better. We want this over as soon as possible, don't we? Just don't do it _all _at once, though. Do it over a couple days… and make sure to tell some good news in between the bad news," was her proposal.

Ginny had hardly anything to say. "Either way is going to be hard on Harry. Just make sure all sharp or potentially dangerous objects are out of the room in case he wants to murder himself."

Draco and Ron chuckled nervously, but Ginny glared at them fiercely. "I am serious, guys. Do you have any idea of theshit that he's going through? NO, you DON'T! So just shut your face and show some sensitivity!!! I don't see either of you rushing in to explain everything to him, so just shut the bloodyfu-"

It was Draco's turn to be upset. "Oh yeah? You want me to just _stroll in there_? I'm sure that would go well!! 'Oi, Potter, it's Malfoy, and you're not supposed to bepissed at me anymore.' I'm sure that would sit well with him."

Hermione had had enough. "SHUT UP, the two of you! I know this is difficult, but let's not let it tear us apart."

Draco and Ginny sat down on the bench.

"I'm sorry, Ginny," Draco said genuinely.

"No, Draco, I'm the one who should be sorry."

---

Two days later, Ginny arrived to visit Harry and saw that his eyes were red and puffy, and his cheeks were wet. She immediately asked him what was the matter.

"D-Dumbledore, and-and Remus," he sobbed. "They're really gone."

Ginny just nodded. He finally realized it, she thought.

She looked at Harry's face and noticed the boy beneath the man. Although his body was grown up, he was sobbing like a little boy. Poor boy, Ginny thought. He was forced to grow up so quickly. She loved him so much. She loved his eyes, his smile, his hair… and she loved the man he had become. Filled with love and compassion, Ginny reached out and pulled Harry into a hug.

He gladly returned her embrace. They sat there holding each other for a while, and then Ginny pulled away. Harry wouldn't admit it, but he wanted to hold her, to have her forever. He felt alive again in her arms. Little did he know, but she felt the same way.

Days passed, and Harry had many well-wishers and visitors. Among them was a group that was part of the Order.

Harry saw the huge group approaching and sat up quickly as the door opened, bumping his head on the headboard of his bed. He winced.

"Wotcher, Harry," said Tonks with a wink. She currently had long, straight, black hair with pink highlights, which were accented with her pink sparkly eyeshadow and hot pink belt. She was wearing a black and pink polka dotted t-shirt with washed out flared jeans.

"Tonks!" Harry cried happily. "Wow, you match perfectly today."

"Sure do," she said with another wink. "I try my best, you see, because last time I had purple hair, green shirt, khakis, a black belt, a…"

"Er, that sounds great, but why don't you discuss your fashion… erm, issues, with Hermione or Ginny? I'm not exactly the man for the job," said Harry quickly.

Tonks laughed. "It's alright. Just got a bit carried away with myself, you see."

Then Harry spotted Bill and Charlie there, each with a girl. Bill was with Fleur, and Charlie's girlfriend was not familiar to Harry.

"Bill, Charlie! I see you've found yourselves girlfriends!" Harry said.

The two girls looked at each other, embarrassed. Harry swiftly apologized. "Sorry. It's just, last thing I knew, well, you know…"

Fleur nodded. "Do not worry about zat, Harry. Zis is Lily," she said, gesturing toward Charlie's girlfriend.

Charlie spoke. "I met her doing work with dragons. We both love to work with them as much as we love each other."

"Nice to meet you, Lily," Harry said politely, trying to make up for the embarrassment he might have caused her. "So, are you two married?"

They glanced at each other. "Well, not yet," Lily said with a grin. "Soon."

Harry put on a horrified look. "You mean, you let your baby brother marry before you, Charlie? I'm ashamed!"

Charlie laughed. "Ah, yes, I admit it. But they have been in love for many years. We just met each other a year ago."

"Fleur and I are married, though," Bill said proudly, holding her hand. She smiled. "Two years ago."

"That's wonderful!" Harry said.

Kingsley Shacklebolt and Dedalus Diggle smiled at him, as did all the other Order Members. Then Harry spotted Snape in the back. He appeared to be trying to hide himself. Well, Harry wasn't exactly thrilled to see him either, so he didn't acknowledge him. Obviously, since the whole Order was coming, Snape was required to come.

Mrs. Weasley was there again, and this time, Mr. Weasley had come too. He was on a cane. Harry didn't want to appear rude, but nonetheless he stared at the cane. Mr. Weasley wasn't that old, so why did he need a cane?

Mr. Weasley must have seen Harry staring, because he smiled grimly. "Ah, Harry, just got hit by a nasty little spell during the great battle, that's all." Mrs. Weasley shot him a warning glance, but it was too late.

Harry frowned. "That's the second time I've heard of this 'great battle.' Can someone please explain to me what it is?"

All the Order Members shifted slightly in their stances, obviously uncomfortable. Nobody wanted to be the one to tell Harry about the great battle. The room was utterly silent.

Finally Mr. Weasley spoke. "I guess since nobody else wants the honors of explaining this, then I will because it's my fault that I brought it up. Anyone want to explain? I'm sure a whole lot of you could do it better than I." When no one spoke up, Mr. Weasley began.

"Well, Harry, in your 7th year, the Order heard a rumor that Voldemort was hiding only a few miles away from Hogwarts, planning an assault on the school within a few days."

Harry cut in. "Who's Voldemort?" he asked, though he thought he might have heard the name before.

A hush fell over the Order. Everyone exchanged shocked glances.

"Oh, Harry, you don't remember You-Know-Who?" asked Dedalus Diggle, horrified.

"Dedalus, the war is over, and Voldemort is dead. There is no reason to be still calling him 'You-Know-Who' and such names anymore. We have discussed this, Dedalus…" Mr. Weasley said in an exasperated voice.

"Of course, Minister, of course."

Harry's mouth fell open. "You're the minister of magic, Mr. Weasley?!"

Mr. Weasley smiled. "Why, yes I am."

Harry grinned. "That's wonderful!" Then his grin faded. "So about this Voldemort guy…"

Mr. Weasley's smile vanished in the blink of an eye. "Erm, yes, Voldemort. He is an evil wizard, Harry. When you were a baby, he murdered your parents and then tried to kill you. But he couldn't. Something about you stumped him that night."

Harry gasped. "I remember! I dreamed about that while I was sleeping!"

Mr. Weasley was shocked. Usually bouts of amnesia lasted much longer than when the memory was first mentioned.

"Well, go on!" Harry said excitedly. "Tell me of another time I met Voldemort!"

"Well, perhaps my son Ronald might be better fit to-"

"I'm here, Dad."

Ron had appeared by the door. Mr. Weasley looked mortified.

"This was a meeting for the former Order, Ronald Weasley!" he practically yelled. "And you, may I remind you, were NOT part of that Order!"

"Well, I overheard you talking," Ron said casually. "I'd like to thank Fred and George for that."

The twins beamed. "Using the old Extendable Ears, eh, bro? I always knew they'd come back!" said Fred.

"Remember the days, Fred…" George said dreamily. "Listening into Order meetings with the sacred things-"

"Now that's enough!" Mrs. Weasley cut in sharply. "Well, dear, if you want to explain to Harry, I'm sure you know more than I do."

Ron sat on the edge of Harry's bed. "Well, er, I only would have been there in your first year, Harry…"

"And I was there for your second," a voice cut in.

Harry smiled as Ginny had appeared by the door.

"THAT'S IT! I WILL NOT HAVE ANY OTHERS IN THIS ROOM! Arthur would you please go make sure no others are listening in?" Mrs. Weasley roared.

After a moment Mr. Weasley was back. "I shooed them away; but it was only Hermione and Draco after all…"

Mrs. Weasley cleared her throat loudly, but again, it was too late.

"Draco? Draco _Malfoy_???" Harry asked suspiciously.

"Well, yes, dear. Draco Malfoy indeed," Mrs. Weasley forced a smile, and immediately attempted to redirect the conversation in another direction. "So, Ronald, would you care to explain things to Harry?"

For the first time since he woke up, Harry looked truly angry. "I will not have that Slytherin git near this room!" he said in a strained voice, a failed attempt not to lose his temper.

"Oh, please Harry, he's not that bad anymore… he helped our side a lot in the war."

"Hermione? What are you doing here?" Mr. Weasley cried in despair, because obviously his attempt to 'shoo them away' hadn't worked for long. He would've yelled louder, but Hermione was not yet his child… though she would soon be his daughter-in-law.

"Sorry Mr. Weasley. Let's just say the outdated Extendable Ears have been replaced. I wasn't listening in, but when I saw Draco's face… well, I couldn't help it," Hermione admitted, her face turning red.

Fred and George were delighted. "Miss Granger being naughty? I thought I'd never see the day!" George beamed at her.

Fred was grinning. "So they really worked, did they? Brilliant little things. Much better than the Extendable Ears, I must admit, though those were a classic…"

Mrs. Weasley was as furious as her husband. "What are these 'little things'? TELL ME RIGHT NOW! Honestly, you two will never learn!"

The twins shrugged. "Not important right now," Fred mumbled.

"Yes, you'll find out soon enough," George said.

Hermione tried to bring order back to the room. Harry looked overwhelmed and hadn't spoken for a while.

"Everyone, please? Can we just get through this; I think Harry is utterly confused right now."

"Hell, yeah!" Harry said loudly.

Hermione looked nervous. "Well, Harry, please don't be mad. You need to know… Draco? Draco, please," she called down the hall.

Pause.

"No, I'm sure it'll be fine."

A longer pause.

"Draco, just come in here this instant. I will take no more of your nonsense."

An even longer pause.

"Draco, don't make me hex you!"

A _very short_ pause and then a blonde haired man appeared by in the doorway, looking very frightened.

"Hello, Harry," Draco Malfoy said hesitantly.

"Hello, _Malfoy_," Harry said rather coldly.

Draco turned slightly red, and then looked to Hermione for assistance. But someone else came to his rescue.

"Oh, honestly, Potter, could you just stop being such an insufferable prat?"

Severus Snape had decided to make his appearance.

Harry was completely speechless. Of course Snape had always favored Draco Malfoy in school, but he had encouraged the conflict between them. Now he wanted them to become friends?

Once the shock wore off, he glared at Snape. "Oh yeah? You expect me to become friends with the person who insulted me and my friends all throughout school? And I'm supposed to believe that crap from the person that always put me down because of my father, who, I am happy to say, I AM DAMN WELL PROUD OF!"

Snape looked just as shocked. He was seething. "I favored Draco because I thought he had a chance! I knew that there was a chance he wouldn't become a Death Eater like his father! Believe me, Potter, I know what it's like. I wanted to keep him on our side before it was too late!"

Before Harry could speak, Hermione cut in. "I think Draco should take up the story from here."

Draco spoke rather quietly, and Harry noticed a change in him. He was still not prepared to accept his childhood enemy, but at least he was willing to listen to him.

"I didn't know how else to treat you guys. My father taught me no other way to treat people than to bully them and make their lives miserable. Crabbe and Goyle were only my friends because they were afraid of me.

"One day, when I was visiting my father's house over the holidays, and he said we needed to go somewhere. I told him, 'Go yourself, I'm going to take a nap,'" or something along those lines.

"So I went to sleep, and then next thing I knew, I had woken up in a dark place, staring into the red eyes of Lord Voldemort. I soon realized that I had the Dark Mark on my arm and I was his newest Death Eater.

"I went back to Hogwarts proud of being a Death Eater. But in the back of my mind… I was worried. I had never really dreamed of being a servant of Lord Voldemort. That was my father's dream, not mine.

"Soon enough, Dumbledore, God rest his soul, found out. He called me to his office and questioned me. He said, 'Draco, I can tell that you are unsure of being a Death Eater.'

"I admitted that I was. I would rather just stay out of it, but now that I was a Death Eater, I might as well go through with it. But Dumbledore gave me another option. He said, 'Spy for us. If you do not want to pledge your loyalty to Voldemort, then join the Order."

"I was a little bit scared of this, but it was better than serving the Dark Lord. I was instructed to never tell anyone of this.

"Then, the great battle came. Voldemort had called all of his servants to him when he sensed the battle coming. I was petrified. What was I to do now that I was with his Death Eaters?

"Dumbledore found me. I was hiding behind a rock in hopes of the Death Eaters not finding me, or assuming me dead. He spoke to me, he said, 'Now is the time to redeem yourself, Draco. Fight with us, and everyone will accept you as a good man."

Draco began to clear his throat more often, and his eyes were watering. "He helped me up out from behind the rock, and my father saw. 'Kill him, you fool,' he told me, but I was frozen, unable to respond. Then, Voldemort raised his wand and shot the killing curse at me…"

Draco took a shuddering breath. "Albus Dumbledore lunged in front of me and took the curse. He-h-he did not die immediately, he was too powerful. His l-last words to me were…"

Tears were streaming down his face now, but Draco continued. "His last words were, 'You have a good heart, Draco. Tell Harry Potter goodbye from me.' Th-then, he… died."

Harry looked at Draco with new respect. Through his tears, Harry slowly nodded and held out his hand.

Draco accepted it and the two of them shook hands, teary eye upon teary eye stared at each other with new friendship.

---

Please review! I'm sorry for the delay… the disk I had this story saved on broke, so I had to retype everything. Do you like it? Thank you reviewers! I appreciate all the feedback!

Kelsey


	7. Recovery then Relapse

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 6

Recovery then Relapse

_Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from JK Rowling's books! Only the characters I created are mine._

---

Over the weeks in St. Mungo's, Harry was adjusting to the world he had woken into, and was making a slow but sure recovery. All the news had been broken to Harry. He now could remember all of his memories of Voldemort from every year, including his 7th, when the great battle occurred. The last week before the battle was still a blur to him, however.

Hermione informed him proudly that he had done quite well on his NEWTS. Hermione, of course, had gotten top marks in every subject. Ron had done slightly worse than Harry, but still pretty good. Only Harry got better marks than Hermione in DADA.

Harry struggled to remember something more that had happened during that fateful week… he knew there was something important somewhere in his memories, but he could not find it. He became frustrated with himself because he knew that it was something truly wonderful. Finally he decided to ask Ginny about it, because he had a hunch that it had to do with her.

"Ginny, may I ask you something? It's just… I can't remember something important, and I think that it has to do with you," he said questioningly.

"Sure, go ahead," Ginny said, trying to contain the eagerness in her voice. Was he about to remember her love for him?

"Well, before the battle, I think something wonderful happened, and all I can recall is the wonderful, swept off my feet feeling. Do you have any clue what that could mean?"

Ginny smiled. "Oh, Harry! I know just what you mean! What happened was-"

Harry cut her off. "It's better for me to remember on my own. Please, Ginny, describe some of it to me, and maybe it will come back."

Ginny could hardly keep from bursting out. "In the Hogwarts courtyard, Harry. Just you and me, taking a walk toward the meadows, with the spring flowers beginning to bloom…"

Harry strained his thoughts. "I'm getting an image… continue Ginny, please. I can feel it coming now."

Ginny spoke confidently. "Sitting in a meadow with the butterflies around us… holding hands-" she watched his face hopefully.

Suddenly a smile too big for his face appeared on Harry's face. He remembered everything perfectly now.

---

_Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Hermione all had a free period, and it was a beautiful spring day outside. The snow had melted quickly, and little drops of water were falling off of the trees. The trees were in bloom, the leaves their greenest color with little pink flowers bursting with brilliance. They walked down a path and stopped in front of a meadow. Suddenly Harry realized that Ron and Hermione weren't behind them anymore. He grinned._

"_Looks like Hermione and your brother decided to run off somewhere," Harry said slyly. _

"_Guess so," Ginny said with a grin._

"_Would you like to sit down here?" Harry asked as he spotted a perfect spot in the meadow. _

"_Sure," Ginny said shyly. They sat down on a hill, then laid down on their backs with the sun on their faces. The meadow grasses around them shielded some of the harsh sunrays, and also made the ground more comfortable. Little lavender and yellow flowers bloomed everywhere, and smelled wonderfully like honey._

_This was perfect, Harry thought. It was so beautiful here. Before he could stop himself, he began staring at Ginny. The sun lit up her freckled face like a buttercup. Her red hair fell neatly past her shoulders, and her pale yellow shirt fit her slender figure perfectly._

_She looked up at him, and they both quickly looked away, embarrassed. Then, Harry began to speak._

"_Ginny, I want to tell you something I've wanted to tell you for a long time. Ever since the end of my 2nd year, I've been in love with you. I know Ron might have a fit, but I can't contain my feelings anymore. I love you, Ginny."_

_She was shocked. Ginny had been in love with Harry ever since she first laid eyes on him. Could it be true?_

_Harry's face fell at her expression. "Look, forget it. It was wrong of me to pressure you like that."_

_Ginny shook her head. Suddenly she reached over to him, and put her lips on his. To say Harry was shocked was an understatement. But Harry put his arm around her and ran his fingers through her hair. Then, this kiss became more passionate, and they grew closer and closer. Soon, they broke away for air. But they weren't done yet. Harry kissed Ginny again, and they snuggled up against each other. Then they began to roll down the hill, laughing all the way down. At the bottom, they kissed all over again; Harry stroking Ginny's face; Ginny wrapping her arms around Harry's neck lovingly. They had to break away for air again, and Ginny sighed in content, then stood up. _

"_We'd better get back, Harry," she said glumly. She could've stayed in his arms all day. "Free period ended 5 minutes ago, and Ron and Hermione will wonder where we went."_

_Harry nodded. They walked back to the castle, hand in hand. _

"_Erm, Ginny? I just want to make it official, I guess, so… Ginny, will you be my girlfriend?"_

_Ginny smiled. "Of course, Harry. I love you."_

"_I love you too, Ginny."_

_They reached the castle doors and saw Ron and Hermione. They both looked a bit frazzled, but were grinning broadly. Ron winked at them. _

"_Looks like you two had just a good a time as we did, eh?"_

_Ginny blushed. Harry laughed. _

"_So you two sneaks set us up, did you? Well, it sure worked. Ginny and I are going out."_

_Hermione beamed. "Congratulations."_

---

"Oh, Ginny!" Harry said joyously. "I love you so much. I will always love you as much as I did that day."

"I love you too, Harry. I've been waiting for you to remember all these days! I've been waiting for you."

Harry sat up and pulled Ginny to him and kissed her sweetly. It felt so good. They were finally back together.

---

Anne was working with Harry to get his muscles working fully again after all the time he hadn't used them. He was often light headed when he abruptly stood up out of bed, so they would have him get out slowly.

First he would sit up in bed, then he would sit on the edge of the bed, then stand up, and pause before walking around. Harry grumbled about these instructions, and once he actually fainted from suddenly jumping out of bed. Needless to say, after that experience, Harry didn't need a telling twice to take his time.

Every day Anne took Harry to the workout center, where she would start him walking on the treadmill. Slowly, she would increase the speed, to where eventually Harry was at a fast jog. His endurance was very short though, so she soon had to decrease the speed again. Every day, she would keep the fast jog pace up for 5 more seconds. Harry was making his recovery run!

He also lifted weights and worked out on machines. The muscles that Harry had not used for 3 years now become more defined.

Anne had informed Harry that swimming was great therapy. After swimming a couple slow laps, Harry would go and relax in the hot tub while the jets massaged his sore muscles. Life was good!

But assimilating himself into this new time in age was tough. Everything was different than he remembered it to be. Although Draco was a great guy, Harry was still having a hard time adjusting to the new 'Malfoy'. He was so… _different._ Though the change was good.

Hagrid had come by to see Harry. Harry couldn't help but think that Hagrid was the last person who was like family to him, a father in place of the one he lost. The Weasleys, of course, were his family now. But Harry wanted to see Hagrid still. The Weasleys agreed happily.

Hagrid was tearing up, and so was Harry. It was in happiness though, for Harry was relieved to have Hagrid still with him.

Hermione, Ron, and Ginny had stayed with him while he opened all the presents that had been left over the years. He noticed that he didn't even recognize some of the people they were from.

"You're famous, Harry," Hermione said when Harry asked her. "Everyone knows who you are."

There was a tiny Christmas tree set up in the corner of his room, and it was practically blocked from view from the massive pile of presents around it.

"Not all of them are Christmas presents, mate," Ron said, "but there wasn't much room anywhere else. See the table there? Those are the presents that came after you woke up. There is some mail there too."

First Harry went through the pile of presents by the Christmas tree. Hermione, of course, organized the presents by year so that everything was in order.

Harry eagerly dug into the first year's presents. Hermione gave him an enchanted picture of the four of them. She smiled with tears in her eyes.

"You haven't been moving in that picture for over 3 years now, Harry. Now we can finally see you again."

It was a beautiful picture. They were sitting by a creek in the woods, and the sunlight shone on them from a crack in the trees above.

"Thanks Hermione, it's wonderful," Harry said truthfully.

Next, he went for Ron's present. Hermione rolled her eyes. Harry grinned.

"So how did those Chudley Cannons do while I was sleeping?" Harry asked with a laugh as he opened the package to reveal a Chudley Cannons sweater, along with some Bernie Botts Every Flavor Beans.

"Erm, they did alright, I suppose. Lost about as many as they won. Oh, and Harry? You might not er, want to eat the candy. It's nearly 4 years old."

Harry realized this as he had already stuffed his mouth with 3 beans. He grimaced as he tried to chew the stale candy, then gagged.

"That's not the only problem! This is spinach, liver, and cauliflower!" Harry cried in dismay and spit out the candy across the room as his friends rolled on the floor with laughter. The door opened to his room.

"What's all the ruckus in here?" Anne asked suspiciously, then spotted the jelly bean mush on the floor.

"Don't you be trashing this hospital, Mr. Potter!" she chastised him playfully. She magicked the remains of the candy into the garbage can, then left the room.

Next was Ginny's gift. He noticed she was not laughing as he opened it. He opened the green tissue paper to reveal a snowglobe. He pushed a button and the globe darkened. Then, bursts of purple, red, green, and blue shot across the globe. Suddenly a big burst of yellow filled the glass, then it grew dark again and began to glimmer. A voice spoke:

_Now I lay me down to sleep  
I pray the Lord my soul to keep  
If I should die before I wake  
I pray the Lord my soul to take  
Keep me safely through the night  
And wake me up with morning light._

Ginny had tears in her eyes. "I'm so glad you're awake, Harry."

Harry forced himself not to cry. "So am I."

He pulled her into a hug, and they embraced warmly for a moment, and then broke away. Something under the tree caught his eye.

A red envelope was lying under the tree, and it read:

_From a friend of your father_.

Harry reached for it in shock. There weren't any other friends of his father left alive… or were there?

He opened it, and then a howl echoed throughout the room.

"I'LL KILL YOU IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO, POTTER! MARK MY WORDS, IF I HELPED MURDER YOUR FATHER, THEN I CAN MURDER HIS SON! TREAD CAREFULLY, YOU HALFBLOOD SCUM!!!"

Harry cried out in pain as the letter exploded and scorched his hand with red finger-like strands. They spread up his arms, wrapping around his neck… he was losing consciousness… his whole body burned, and the red fingers were choking him.

Ron shouted, Ginny lunged toward Harry to try to save him, and Hermione grabbed her wand. The red strands glowed before his eyes, then pressed over his eyelids and closed them. The horrible burning sensation came over his eyes… and then the red-hotness faded into a black nothingness.

---

The next thing he knew he was lying in the hospital bed, and everything in his vision was tinted red. He groaned. He felt awfully hot under all the blankets, and the hot rag on his face was torturing him…

Harry ripped off the hot rag and took off all the blankets, but then he felt even warmer than before. He cried out in agony, and Anne hurried in.

"Harry, no! You must keep the cold rag on your face! And the sheets were magicked cold, so they must stay too!"

He groaned painfully, making his inflamed throat sting. Anne held out an ice cube to him in her palm.

"Here, suck on this, Harry. It might make you feel better."

He took the ice cube gratefully, only to fine that it seemed lukewarm to his mouth. Everywhere on his body felt like it was on fire except his feet and hands. He soon realized that his feet were in a bucket of ice water, and each hand was too. They just felt numb, which was a great relief to Harry. He hardly noticed Anne leave the room, because everything was blurred red and he could hardly see anything.

He heard footsteps coming into the room again, and heard Anne's voice. "Harry, you need to drink this potion," she said indicating to a large container with pink potion inside, "and then this Dreamless Sleep Potion," gesturing toward the smaller potion.

"Okay," Harry said tiredly. He quickly drank the foul tasting pink potion, and as it slid down his enflamed throat, it felt strangely icy. Then, he drank the Dreamless Sleep Potion, and it fell from his grasp before he could finish the last gulp, and his head fell back onto the pillow in exhaustion.

---

Harry woke to loud voices outside. His eyelids felt very heavy, so he kept them shut and listened to the conversation.

"We _cannot_ let this happen again!" a shrill voice said.

"Minerva, it wasn't out fault! He just grabbed the envelope and opened it without a word!" That was Hermione.

"I don't care what he did… the fact is, we can't allow him to open any presents he doesn't know who they're from."

A different voice cut in. "There may even be some presents that say they're from friends, but aren't. I once got mail that said it was from a friend, and it turned out to be a torturous spell from my father as punishment for… well, I'd rather not discuss it."

The next voice he recognized. "I'll open everything for him, unless I remember sending it. That way, whatever it is inside of it will harm me, not him," Ginny said.

Harry finally found his voice. "No!" he spoke loudly, though his throat was still slightly sore.

The group outside turned in surprise to face him. Anne rushed in.

"How are you feeling, Harry? I took off all the cold sheets because you looked pretty decent. Would you like to take a cold bath?"

"Sure. But Ginny will not be putting herself in danger for my presents! I will either throw away ones that look suspicious, or open them myself."

Anne sighed. "Well… alright. But just take a cold bath and relax for a while." She turned on the cold water and left the room to give him privacy.

Once in the tub, Harry sighed contentedly. The cold water felt good on his hot and enflamed muscles. There were scorch marks on his arms too. Who could've sent that horrid letter? There weren't any of his father's friends left alive… Prongs, Moony, and Padfoot were dead.

Then, he realized. There was one other Marauder that could still be alive. And the puzzle pieces seemed to fit perfectly.

Peter Pettigrew.

---

Finally, some action! The next chapter will be the last with Harry in the hospital, I promise! Please review! Luv ya!

Kelsey


	8. Free Man

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 7

Free Man

_Disclaimer: JK Rowling created the world of Harry Potter, not me._

The news that Peter Pettigrew was alive and was out to get Harry troubled him. Harry had nightmares about it, though he didn't understand. Peter had hardly been any trouble for him compared to Voldemort. Yet for some reason, in his dreams, he always saw the shadow of Voldemort following Wormtail wherever he went. And Voldemort was dead! He had killed him!

Harry awoke in the middle of the night from another nightmare. He rubbed his eyes and calmed himself down. Maybe he was going crazy. But he desperately wanted the dreams to stop, so he tried to casually bring it up to Anne.

"So, how'd you make that Dreamless Sleep Potion that you gave me after I opened that bloody letter?" Harry tried to ask casually.

Anne's eyes narrowed. "And what business is it of yours? Why do you need to know?"

"Oh, er, nothing," Harry lied a little too quickly.

Anne's eyes narrowed even more, though it didn't even seem possible. "Have you been having bad dreams, Harry James Potter?"

He knew he was in for it when she used his full name. He sighed.

"I told you to tell me about any nightmares you may be having, Harry," she said, her tone still slightly harsh. "You need to tell me these things."

She looked at him expectantly, but he pretended not to notice and quickly averted his gaze toward his bedspread.

Anne cleared her throat loudly.

"What?" Harry asked her.

"You know what. Don't play smart with me, Mr. Potter!" Anne said, barely hiding her smile.

Harry sighed deeply. "Alright. I've been having nightmares about Peter Pettigrew," he said quickly, leaving out the details.

"That can't be all," Anne said suspiciously.

"It is," Harry tried to lie, but he had the impression that Anne didn't believe him.

"Alright, if you want to be difficult, fine. But no Dreamless Sleep Potion until you tell me everything. And believe me, I will _know_ when you have told me everything." She stalked out of the room.

"You a Legilimens or something?" Harry called after her.

She chose not the answer. Then, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny walked in.

"We thought we could finish opening those presents, Harry," Ron said with a smile.

"But we have to be careful. We don't want anything to harm you," Hermione said seriously.

"I heard McGonagall blaming you lot out there. I'm sorry for going for that card… I totally forgot it could be some version of a Howler. The red just seemed Christmas-like to me."

"It's okay, Harry. We'll just be more careful this time," Ginny said.

"We've already thrown out the presents with no sender written on them," Hermione said practically. "And any presents that looked suspicious."

It was a joyful time for Harry. He received all types of presents from a lot of different people. He reached for a black parcel from Hagrid eagerly.

He noticed Hermione frowning. She whispered something urgently in Ron's ear, then Ginny put her hand on Harry's arm.

"Don't open that, Harry," she said, and Harry was surprised to detect a hint of fear in her voice.

"Oh, don't worry, Hagrid's sent loads of odd things before. It can't be that dangerous," Harry replied, his finger undoing the bow quickly. He had a strong urge to open the package as quickly as possible.

"Stop, Harry." He was shocked to hear the desperate urgency in Hermione's voice. So he did stop, though the mysterious wanting for the parcel still remained.

"What's wrong? It's from Hagrid, guys."

"Harry, we went through the presents yesterday. Hagrid always sent you one present. There's another one from him in the pile, and it looks more like his handwriting."

Ginny suddenly gasped. "Hermione, I remember a black parcel like that with yellow ribbon! Yesterday, it said it was from Ron!"

Ron started to say that he had not sent the package, but a hush fell over the room. Suddenly, the parcel had twitched slightly, and let out a soft moan, and some black mist escaped from the side of the package.

Ron paled, Hermione shrieked, and Ginny was shaking visibly. Harry felt the sudden strong urge to open the box come back, and he couldn't resist this time. He reached toward it longingly…

He couldn't hear his friends telling him no. His hands were on the ribbon, and suddenly he felt cold and shaky, though the desperate desire to open the box remained.

"IMPEDIMENTA!" cried a voice suddenly, and Harry froze as the spell hit him. Anne 'Wingardium Leviosa'-ed the parcel out of the room quickly.

Harry was trembling slightly, and his friends expressed their concerns.

"I'm fine. Let's finish opening these," he said rather uneasily. As he opened the rest of the presents, the happiness from what each contained was only temporary, as he kept thinking about what was inside the box. It refused to escape from his thoughts, and it was torturing him. No other boxes looked suspicious, and he opened the rest of them.

That night, he couldn't sleep. He dimmed the lights slightly but kept them on, for the darkness seemed to close in upon him. Eventually, he fell into a troubled sleep, escalating into a nightmare.

_The black package was slowly sliding along the floor in the hallway toward his room. It entered the room and approached the bed ever so slowly. He was shaking, in his mind not wanting to open the package, though he found his hands undoing the yellow ribbon once and for all. The package opened…_

_A cold wind bit at his face. The dark mist filled the room, and he heard a voice. _

"_Avada Kedavra!"_

_Everything was in slow motion… Harry waited for himself to say Protego, for he had replayed the scene in his mind many times. But he did not speak. The green light approached him, gaining speed now, only a few feet away from him…_

_1 foot._

_6 inches…_

Harry woke with a scream just before the curse hit him and tried to calm himself. He was shivering, and had broken into a cold sweat. He turned the lights as high as they would go and pulled the blankets around him. He did not sleep the rest of the night. What did the dream mean? It seemed so real, but before he had reflected the curse.

The next morning he was feeling much better, for some strange reason. Today, for some reason, seemed like it would turn out to be a good day. He did his usual routine: Get up, get dressed, try to tame his hair (this usually did not work, however), get some breakfast, brush his teeth. Then he went for a swim and Anne ran him on the treadmill. He noticed her smiling more than usual.

Finally he could contain his curiosity no longer. "What are you smirking at?" he asked.

"You have finally reached your goal, Mr. Potter. You can run at a fast jog for 5 minutes now. I think it is time for you to go home."

Harry could hardly contain his glee. He stuttered in shock. "Are-are you… serious?"

"Why would I joke about something like this?"

Harry grinned so wide that Anne thought his smile would fall off of his face.

"Waking up into a new worldhas been tough, but I think I'm ready to face the real world again. I'm ready to go home," Harry said determinedly. Then realization dawned on him.

"Where do I go? I don't attend Hogwarts anymore," he said, slightly crestfallen, then angry. " I am _not _going back to my aunt and uncle's house! There is no way that I-"

Anne cut him off quickly. "Plans have already been made for that. I know just where you'd want to be."

When Harry looked at her questioningly, she just smiled. "Wanna live with Ron, Hermione, and Ginny?"

"Of course! Oh, that'd be wonderful!" Harry exclaimed.

"Molly, of course, offered to house you at the Burrow, but we figured it'd be best to hang out with your friends at their place," explained Anne.

"Tell Molly thanks anyway. That was nice of her," said Harry. "Blimey, I am really looking forward to getting out of here! Er, no offense, Anne. You were great," Harry added quickly.

"None taken. You're a free man, Mr. Potter. And since you're no longer my patient, I feel no guilt in giving you this."

It was a pint of Dreamless Sleep Potion. She held it out to him, then pulled it away as he reached his hand out.

"Only if you tell me _exactly_ what you were dreaming about," she said with a sly grin.

Harry sighed in defeat. "Alright. Well, I dreamed about Peter Pettigrew coming to the hospital and cursing me to oblivion. Except, everywhere he went, the shadow of Lord Voldemort followed. It was creepy. Okay, go ahead. Laugh. I don't care."

Anne didn't laugh. Harry blinked.

"I'm not laughing, Harry. I would be scared if I was having those dreams too. Alright, here's the potion. I guess you can say you earned it."

Harry grinned that 17-year-old grin thatAnne had come to know so well. He was finally getting out of here! He had spent the past month and a half in the hospital. _No, _he mused with a chuckle, _the past 4 years._

He quickly packed his things and put on a coat. As he walked out the doors to the hospital, he looked back fondly at St. Mungo's.

"G'bye," he whispered softly, then turned to see Ginny, Ron, and Hermione waiting for him. They grinned widely, and beckoned him forward. _I'm going home, _Harry thought. _Home._

_I'm a free man at last._

---

I meant to make this a bit longer, but I have to leave for vacation tomorrow. Sorry if there's some errors, but I thought something was better than nothing. I am on vacation until Dec. 27th, so don't expect a new chapter until then or maybe later.

Ciao! Happy Holidays!

Kelsey


	9. Out of Harm's Way

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 8

Out of Harm's Way

_Disclaimer: I only own the plot of this story. All of the characters belong to JK Rowling._

Ron, Hermione, and Ginny had all headed off to work, leaving Harry behind feeling very lonely and naïve. He felt like a little kid, staying home while its parents went to work. To help pass the time, he made a list of things to do.

_Harry's To-Do List_

_1. Pick up Hedwig at Ministry of Magic_

_2. Owl Hagrid_

_3. Write thank-you's for gifts_

_4. Make a surprise visit to Ron and Hermione at Hogwarts_

_5. Make a surprise visit to Ginny at the Ministry of Magic_

_6. Visit Diagon Alley and bring back loads of treats for everyone_

_7. Buy Christmas gifts_

_8. Withdraw money from Gringotts_

_9. Take a nap_

_10. Eat_

_11. Relax_

_12. Go through Anne's exercise routine_

_Bloody hell, _Harry thought, _how the blazes am I going to do all that in 5 hours?_

Harry took a deep breath. _Okay, relax. You've just gotten out of the hospital. That doesn't mean you have to go from being a lazy bum to being a workaholic and rush around everywhere to make yourself feel useful._

Harry suddenly felt uneasy for no reason. _Maybe it's just restlessness, _he thought. _After all, I've done nothing useful for nearly 4 years. _But the unsettling feeling got worse. He needed to leave. But why?

_Just get out. Quickly, _said the voice. Harry thought that maybe he really did need to get out, so he grabbed his coat and headed for the door at a very rushed pace. He opened the door, hurled himself out the door, and slammed it shut as quickly as he had opened it. He was breathing hard. _Probably in panic, _he thought uneasily. _Why did I feel like I had to leave? What's wrong?_

Harry nearly slapped himself. If he was to be out of the house, he might as well do something. And, of course, in his rush to 'get out', he had left his list on the kitchen counter. He turned around to go and get it, then stopped dead in his tracks.

Something was moving in there. Shadows moved across the wall, playing tricks on his mind…

This time Harry really did panic. He fought the scream that rose in his throat, because on each shadow, he thought that he saw red pupils staring at him… just staring at him mercilessly.

He quickly apparated to just outside the Hogwarts grounds. He was safe for the moment.

After Harry entered the castle, his 17-year-old self gave him the intuition to go see the Headmaster, like he did when something strange had happened. Then, he realized that he shouldn't for three reasons. _A-_ Dumbledore wasn't the Headmaster anymore. _B-_ He wasn't a student in the school anymore. And _C-_ He was grown up and shouldn't act like a baby.

So, instead, he tried to navigate his way to the Defense Against the Arts classroom, where he would hopefully find Ron. Harry hoped he wouldn't be teaching the class today, so that he could talk to him.

Suddenly Harry saw a rush of students coming down the hall. _Oh, crap, _he thought, _I'm never going to get anywhere now. Class has just ended._

Students noticed the strange man in the hallway. Harry tried to keep his head down and hurry through the halls, but it was useless. He heard gasps, whispers, and even shouts. Students whispered to each other quickly.

"Is that who I think it is?"

"_The _Harry Potter?"

"What's he doing here?"

"Mr. Potter, can I have your autograph?"

Harry sighed and nodded reluctantly. "Do you have a spare quill I could keep for a while?" he asked, anticipating that he might need to leave a note for Ron if he was in the middle of class by the time he got there.

The student's face lit up. "Oh, most certainly, Mr. Potter." He pulled a pen out of his pocket, and a camera. That blonde haired boy looked strangely familiar to Harry…

"Hang on," he said frowning, "are you by chance related to Colin Creevey?"

The boy grinned widely. "He's my older cousin!" He quickly snapped a picture and it printed out for Harry to sign. While he was signing, Harry noticed the boy whispering to his friends.

"He knows my cousin! The famous Harry Potter recognized _me!_"

His friends looked slightly jealous. _Am I really that famous, _he asked himself, puzzled. He handed the picture back to the boy and started to barge through the crowds again.

"Mr. Potter, over here!"

"Oh, sign this, Mr. Potter!"

"Don't forget me!"

"Harry Potter is here? Where is he?"

After signing several more students' papers and such, he put an end to all of the rubbish.

"Alright, look, I'm sorry everyone, but I have to see someone and I can't sign anything else. You'd all better get to class."

"But class doesn't start for 2 minutes!"

"I'm sure Professor Grimwall would understand if we were a bit tardy, don't worry."

"I mean, you're Harry Potter after all!"

"I'm not so sure Professor Snape would allow tardiness! I got a detention from him last week for being late."

Harry stopped in his steps. "Sna- er – Professor Snape is still here, is he?" he said, trying to sound casual and not cold.

"Indeed I am, Potter."

Harry whirled around. "Professor Snape! I … didn't see you there…"

Snape cut him off abruptly. "Everyone get to your classes… NOW!" he said loudly, making everyone jump and hurry off to class.

"But sir, I didn't get an autograph…" said a first-year girl in Gryffindor robes.

"That's just too bad, Miss Weasley," Snape said in a sarcastically sweet voice. Now GET TO CLASS!"

Harry wanted to show Snape that he wasn't to be superceded anymore, so he stopped the little girl. "So your last name is Weasley? I was Ron Weasley's best mate."

"Of course you were, Potter," Snape said coldly, "Now, Miss Weasley, you'd better-"

"Oh no. I'll write a note to her next teacher," Harry said with a sly grin at Snape. "Who's your father, Miss Weasley?" Snape grumbled slightly and left.

"His name's Bill. I'm adopted into the family," she said proudly.

"Ah, Bill. Great man," said Harry. "I'll sign a spare bit of parchment, if you'd like."

The girl's eyes lit up brightly. "Okay!" She pulled out the least wrinkled sheet of paper she could find, then handed it to him. She also pulled out another sheet for Harry to write a note to her teacher. After signing the parchment, Harry asked her what class she had next.

"Transfiguration with Professor McGonagall," she said with a spark of enthusiasm. "My second favorite class."

"And what's your first?" asked Harry as he handed her the note.

"Defense against the Dark Arts. It's always fun when Uncle Ron – oops, I mean Professor Weasley – teaches classes."

Harry grinned. "Does he give you a detention for calling him Uncle Ron in class?"

She shook her head. "Nope. Just a telling off."

"You'd best be off now. What's your name, again?"

"Angelica Weasley."

"Hand this to your professor, please," Harry said.

"Okay. Bye Mr. Potter."

"Bye Angelica."

He followed her to her class and stood outside the classroom door and listened to a bit of the class. Angelica took her seat, and Professor McGonagall immediately asked her why she was late.

"I have a note, Professor."

Minerva took the note and read it swiftly, her eyes darting to either side of the paper. When she reached the bottom, her eyes widened. She looked outside the door towards Harry, and he smiled warmly.

"If you'll excuse me for a moment, class." She opened the door and closed it behind her.

"Coming back for school, Harry?" she said jokingly.

He laughed. "No, just come to see Ron and Hermione. Well, actually I came out of panic." His eyes darkened.

"What's wrong?" Minerva asked him.

"I was at the house, and suddenly I felt the urge to get out quickly. At first, I ignored it, but then I did leave. When I looked back inside the house, I noticed movement throughout the living room. The shadows danced on the walls, and each one had red pupils staring at me. I apparated here because, well, I was sort of scared," he admitted, turning red.

The Professor pondered this for a moment. "Please let me know if this happens again. But I believe it was just your imagination, Harry. I'm sorry, but I need to get back to class. Owl me if you need anything."

"All right," Harry said uneasily. "Er, thanks." She walked back into the classroom. _For nothing, _he added to himself. But then again, what did he expect her to do? Provide a perfect explanation of what was going on? Go to the house and see for herself?

He found the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom and peeked in. An old man was teaching the class, and Ron was standing next to him. It looked as if they were doing a demonstration. Ron suddenly caught Harry's eye, and looked puzzled in a good way. He gave Harry a look that said, 'I'll get out as soon as I can.'

After a few minutes, Ron walked outside the door.

"Hey, mate!" he said happily. "Decided to stop by to see your old pal?"

Harry laughed. "Well, I was going to surprise you later, but…" he cut off and frowned.

Ron's excited expression faded. "What's wrong, Harry?"

Harry told Ron about the sudden urge to get out of the house, and then seeing shadows creeping inside with red pupils on them.

Ron stared at Harry wide-eyed. "You mean to say, Harry, that you thought you saw Voldemort?"

"That's what it seems like, doesn't it?"

"And-and you're _sure_ you didn't… imagine them?" Ron said suspiciously, but also in a worried voice.

"Ron, really, I'm not crazy. All right, maybe I am… but I'm just telling you what I saw. I never said that Voldemort was in your house, but that's what it looked like."

"We should go back just to check things out. Maybe it was just some lamp in the house that flickered or something, Harry. But I guess Hermione and I shouldn't just not believe you or something."

So Ron and Harry hurried down to the library, where Hermione was spending her free period from Muggle Studies. She looked up as she heard footsteps down the hall.

"Ron? _Harry?_ What are you two doing here?" she asked.

"Well, Harry said he saw… something… _interesting _in the house a while ago. He apparated here."

"But he couldn't have apparated here. Harry, you couldn't have. It says in Hogwarts a History-"

"Erm, yes, Hermione, we know," Harry cut in quickly, "I apparated just outside Hogwarts grounds."

"So what did you see, Harry?" Hermione asked with a concerned expression on her face.

Harry launched once again into the story of his leaving the house immediately. Hermione's eyes widened.

"So you're _positive_ that you saw Voldemort in the house and-"

"Yes, Hermione," Harry said, exasperated. "I didn't say he was there, just that's what I saw."

"All right. I think it's time we use that certificate for a break from part of the school day that we received a month ago, Ronald."

Ron grinned. "We never did use that, did we? Let's go!"

So the three of them walked casually to the edge of the Hogwarts grounds and then apparated to the end of their street.

Suddenly something dawned on Hermione. "Harry, you really shouldn't be apparating just after you got out of the hospital like that. You could've splinched yourself easily."

Harry laughed. "Well, I'm still here in one piece, aren't I? C'mon, let's head toward the house."

An uneasiness grew bigger and bigger in Harry's mind as they approached the house. Ron and Hermione seemed unaffected since they continued their light conversation about wizards who'd gotten splinched over the ages.

"What a bunch of dolts," Harry could scarcely heard Ron saying with a chuckle, "you'd think they'd apparated before… Harry, are you all right? Is something wrong? You look a bit peaky."

At the mention of his name, Harry snapped back to reality, though he felt like he was going to be sick from the nervousness that had increased to paranoia in his mind.

"I'm fine," he managed to mumble. "Still think something's in there though."

They approached the front door now. Harry had to force himself to go up the steps to the house. The voice was telling him to leave again.

_Don't go in._

I'm with Ron and Hermione, I'll be fine.

_Do you want to put them in harm's way too?_

No. We'll be fine. Nothing's in there. Leave me alone.

_Turn back while you still can. _

Stop that! I'm just imagining you.

_No, you're not. I'm your subconscious…_

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Harry said aloud without realizing it.

Ron and Hermione looked taken aback.

"Er, sorry for that mate. We'll bugger off… but what'd we do?" Ron asked hesitantly.

Harry shook his head. "Nothing. You didn't do anything. Just talking to myself, is all. Something's telling me to not go in again. That's all."

"Harry, we don't notice anything, so how about we just go first?" Hermione asked soothingly, as if speaking to some scared child.

Harry didn't like being spoken to as if he was crazy, but he sighed reluctantly and nodded. Ron and Hermione slowly entered the house and quickly flipped on the lights. Harry understood why they had done this and was extremely annoyed. They had obviously turned on the lights in a hurry so that the dark house wouldn't form shadows in his mind. But he was sure he had actually seen them! He wasn't crazy, and besides…

_Get out now before it's too late._

Oh, you again. There's no one here. See?

_You're endangering yourself and your friends. Leave now._

Nothing is wrong so stop bugging me.

_Nothing is wrong yet… in five minutes you will be dead in the blink of an eye. GET OUT._

Harry was about to tell the stupid voice to 'shut thehell up' but Ron's voices interrupted his thoughts.

"Oi, Harry, come over here! This isn't mine… there's some strange black sphere over here that's sparking!"

When Harry saw what Ron was pointing at his heart stopped dead. Ron must've seen the look on his face because he started to look pale too. Finally Harry found his voice.

"HERMIONE! THERE'S A BOMB IN HERE!"

A shrill scream was heard from upstairs. Ron looked thoroughly confused and scared.

"What's a bomb? Harry, what's a bomb? WHAT IS A BLOODY BOMB DOING IN MY HOUSE?!" he shouted in panic.

Hermione ran down the stairs quickly, her face ashen white. "Ronald, a bomb is a muggle weapon that explodes and kills you! No time to explain! We need to apparate out of here! How about to Diagon Alley! One-two- oh and Harry don't splinch yourself- Three!"

They all closed their eyes apparated hurriedly. But when they opened their eyes, to their dismay, they found that they were still in the house.

"I guess one of us could've messed up in all this panic, but all three of us?" Harry asked nervously.

Hermione groaned. "A wizard must have enclosed the area in a powerful spell allowing no magic to be performed inside of it! To hell with magic… RUN!" And with that she and Ron took off toward the door.

"Hermione – wait!" Harry cried, suddenly remembering the voice. "We have five minutes… actually probably four by now. Can't we try something more sensible first?"

"Harry, how do you know we have five minutes?" Ron asked.

"You know the voices that told me to get out earlier? They were talking to me again, and everything that they've said has been accurate so far, so I think we can assume that we have four minutes left!" Harry said hurriedly. "Let's put a shield on everything we can and then leave!"

Hermione still looked unsure. "Harry, you can't _think,_ are you _sure…_ you need to be positive, this is a _bomb_…"

"Hermione, believe me. And by now, we probably only have three minutes!" Harry shouted and dashed upstairs to his room. Ron and Hermione followed suit.

"Anyone know a shield spell to repel a bomb?" Harry yelled over his shoulder.

"How would I know? I don't even know what a damn bomb is!" Ron screeched.

Hermione yelled some complicated charm over her shoulder, and after a couple failures, Harry and Ron quickly caught on. They dashed about their rooms shielding anything valuable to them.

"Two minutes…" Ron said loudly.

Hermione hurried out of her room. "I'm finished. This is making me nervous, so I'll wait for you two by the door."

Ron finished within thirty seconds. "C'mon Harry, we need to go! I want to be far from this 'bomb' or whatever it is!"

"I know, I know. I'm coming!" Harry shouted and headed out of the room. Then something caught his eye. The photo album that Hagrid had given him that had pictures of his parents! He shot the spell over his shoulder as he headed out the room. But he missed!

"THIRTY SECONDS, HARRY!" shrieked a hysterical Hermione.

He grabbed the photo album and hurled himself down the stairs as quickly as he could.

The door was locked. "Alohamora," Ron said, but the door didn't budge. "We're done for," Ron muttered hopelessly.

"Oh move _over_," Harry snarled. He turned the lock and opened the door. "Ever heard of actually unlocking a door by hand?"

Ron ignored him. "Ten seconds…" Ron muttered, and they took off at a run. Soon enough they heard a loud explosion form behind them, and they stopped running and turned around, out of breath.

Harry had gotten out of harm's way once again.

---

Sorry about the delay. We just got back from vacation two days ago, and then I was busy submitting my story to yesterday because it was a submission day. Enjoy this chapter!

Kelsey


	10. Away from Home

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 9

Away from Home

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter!!!! ANYWAYS… 

_---_

A/N: Just thought I'd clear some confusion over the last chapter. The area that a wizard enclosed in a 'no-magic' zone was the downstairs, where the bomb was. The upstairs (luckily) happened to be an area where they could use magic. Thus how everyone could use the shielding charms. They were just too nervous to realize they could've easily apparated away from the upstairs. Okay, on with the story!

---

Harry was shocked to find that the house had hardly been damaged on the outside. Hermione and Ron seemed a bit puzzled too, but the three of them were obviously quite relieved. They weren't very wealthy yet, and paying for the damage… and trying to repair it with magic… would be difficult.

Hermione seemed overcome. "Oh, thank God. Harry, you're amazing. Well, I'm sure you'd rather not hear weird voices in your head, but it sure helped out a lot, didn't it?"

Ron agreed. "Yeah, thanks mate. Merlin, would somebody please explain to me what a bome-thingy would be doing in our house?"

"A _bomb_, Ron," Hermione chimed. "And I don't know."

"Let's go inside and see what got damaged," Harry suggested. "Maybe we can do some minor repairs with magic. Besides, a bomb is a Muggle weapon, right? There's probably no lingering magic in the house that our spells would tamper with and cause more problems."

But when the trio entered the house, they found that they were wrong. Very wrong, indeed.

Hermione paled, Harry's blood went cold. Ron seemed the least affected of the three since he didn't know that it wasn't normal for this to happen after a bomb went off.

"Erm… a _Muggle_ weapon can do that?" he asked shakily. "I don't like this one bit. I feel… cold. Like a dementor had come or something."

"A bomb doesn't do this, Ronald," Hermione whispered. "There's some dark magic at work here."

Harry was still frozen and speechless. He was petrified as he stared into the heavy, black mist that was drifting around the house… searching for something. Or someone.

"Harry, are you all right?" Hermione asked worriedly. Harry tried to speak, but he couldn't move. The black mist was calling him… he had go to it…

Harry found himself unconsciously taking a couple faltering steps forward. He was oblivious to the cries of warning from Ron and Hermione. Just as he felt Ron's hand on his shoulder to yank him back, the black mist swooped toward him and surrounded him densely.

Harry's scream died in his throat. He choked on the blackness that entered him, consuming him. Blackness swam all around his vision, and he heard a gasp and the hand left his shoulder. He was alone.

His legs collapsed beneath him, his head hitting against the floor. He was losing consciousness, but couldn't resist as the blackness took over him. But before everything went blank, he heard two people talking.

"_M-master, forgive me… they fled before the explosion and-"_

"_You fool. You and your slimy little Muggle weapons. Foolish scum, Muggles. You have failed me once again, Pettigrew…"_

"_No, master, no! He is there, trapped in the mist! Surely he cannot escape now!"_

_A sharp intake of breath. "At last, the Potter boy may be gone. Do not get your hopes up, Wormtail. He can still fight back…"_

Suddenly the black mist was shaken around, and though it did not disappear, he could see a faint light in the distance. He tried to move toward it, but could not make his muscles work. But the light faded, and he finally lost consciousness.

---

Harry woke up in a brightly-lit room at St. Mungo's. He had the feeling that he'd been here before, and then he realized this was the same room that he'd spent recovering in after his coma. And there was another bed that had been magicked in the room.

"Ron!" Harry cried as he spotted his red-haired mate lying in the bed next to him, his hand in a pot filled with an odd-smelling potion. "Hermione!" She was sitting in a chair next to Ron's bed. But then another red-head entered the hospital room.

"Ginny?" he whispered. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I-"

"What are you apologizing for? Merlin! A bumm explodes in the house and you're apologizing? ----, Potter, what are you thinking?"

Harry chuckled slightly at Ginny's pronounciation of a bomb. "It's a _bomb_, Gin. _Bomb_. And I'm sorry I seem to attract trouble. I really don't mean to."

"Oh, Harry, don't apologize. There's nothing to be sorry about," Hermione said kindly. "It's not your fault."

Suddenly, Harry remembered the voices he had heard before he passed out. He sat up abruptly, much to the dismay of the others. He groaned as he felt extremely dizzy, so he laid back down.

"Guys, I heard these – voices – before I passed out," he began, but Ron cut in.

"Oh no, not these voices again," he said with a half-grimace, half grin. Suddenly Harry noticed how shriveled up his hand looked.

"What happened to you?" he said, gesturing at his hand.

"Oh, well, did you feel a hand on your shoulder, trying to yank you back away from that mist? Well, that was me, mate. The black stuff just sort of… came flying out of nowhere and tried to pull you away with it, so I tried to pull back, and it sort of… attacked my hand, I guess." "Still feels numb," he said as an afterthought. "But I'm alright. It's you who you should be worrying about, not me."

Harry still stared at Ron's hand. It looked shriveled up and awfully limp. "Sorry about that. I didn't mean to go toward it… it told me to. Curse those voices." He swore. "Listen, I heard this conversation before I conked out-"

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "More voices? Again?" she said sarcastically, and they all laughed.

"Er, yeah. It was Peter talking to – to Voldemort," he said hesitantly. They all stared at him. "Voldemort was angry that Peter used a Muggle weapon and tampered with it to try to kill me. But then Peter said that I was trapped in that mist, and Voldemort said not to get his hopes up because I could fight back still. What happened during all that? I saw this light far away."

Hermione took up the story. "Well, Ron had to let go of you because it attacked his hand. I didn't know what to do, so I did the Patronus charm. It seemed to be working a little, but it faded because my memory wasn't happy enough."

"That's when I passed out," Harry commented. "Sorry. Go on."

"By then, Ron had recovered. His Patronus is a bit stronger than mine, I'll admit," she said, blushing slightly. "But our Patronuses together were able to drive the mist away temporarily enough so we could get you here."

Ginny then told her part. "Something in the back of my mind told me that something was wrong," she said looking into his eyes gently. _Oh, she's so beautiful_, Harry thought. "I ignored it for a while, but it only got worse, so I floo-ed to the house. I saw this mass of black mist floating everywhere around the house. I floo-ed to the Ministry as fast as a could, but I soon found out you were at St. Mungo's, so I met you here."

Ginny hesitated for a moment. Both Ron and Hermione gave her looks, so she sighed and opened her mouth to talk again.

"What is it?" Harry asked.

Ginny paused again, and Ron and Hermione's looks got worse. She flushed under everyone's stare. "Erm, Harry, Dad thinks it's best if… you stay here for a while," she said quickly, as if to get it over with. She stared down at the floor.

"Oh, of course. I expect I'll be feeling better in a day or two."

Ginny shook her head. "No, Harry. Well, a little longer than a few days. Maybe… a month?"

"A _month_?" Harry practically yelled. "Gin, I'll be more than fine in a month. I can understand his concern for my health, but I refuse to stay here more than a week. And even that's stretching it."

"It's not that, Harry. It's not about your health. Well, it ultimately is, but… that's not what I mean. This isn't about you getting better from this encounter. It's about keeping you safe from endangering yourself in the future," Hermione cut in.

Harry was frustrated. "So you expect me to live in the samedamn hospital… no. The samedamn _room _that I've been living in for nearly 4 years? I won't! It isn't happening."

"Harry, mate, it's for the best," Ron said, but Harry could tell he didn't really mean it. He wanted his best mate out of the hospital as much as Harry himself did. Ginny and Hermione seemed to want him out of there, too, but they were concerned that he would get attacked again. Ginny especially. Ron knew that Harry needed to get out of here, even if he was in danger. Ginny was waiting patiently, but she was terribly hungry…

_How did I know that?_ Harry asked himself wondrously. _What thehell told me that?_

"Erm, Ginny, are you hungry?" Harry asked suddenly, then turned bright red as he realized how random he sounded.

Ginny turned to him in surprise. "Why, yes I am. How'd you know?"

"I, er, nothing. Just asking," he lied a little too quickly, just deepening the shade of red he had turned.

"Harry James Potter! Are you mind-reading your dearest friends?" Ron said sarcastically, stifling a laugh.

"The mind is not made of lines, to be read like a book," Harry mimicked a certain greasy-haired Potions Master.

"Who said that?" asked Ginny.

"Snape," Harry spat with dislike. He loathed that man.

"Anyway, back to the question at hand. Can you read minds, Harry?" Hermione asked.

"I really don't know. I wasn't even trying to."

"Alright then. Try me, mate. I'll tell you if you're right," Ron challenged.

"Okay," Harry agreed.

He didn't know how to _try_ to read someone's mind. It's not like he'd ever done it before. Harry stared at Ron, yet letting his mind wander, clearing his head of any thoughts. Finally he felt like he was getting through, but he was quickly blocked out.

"Hey!" Harry said. "You can't block me out on purpose! At least lower your defenses so I can try again."

"Looks like you remember some of the things old Snape taught you, eh, Potter?" Ron joked. "All right, all right. I'll let you in this time."

Harry again cleared his mind and willed himself to explore Ron's mind. For a second, he thought he wasn't getting through, but suddenly, he was thinking Ron's thoughts.

_If he actually can read minds, then damn! That's crazy. But…_

_He's reading my mind. HI HARRY! _

_This is a bit uncomfortable. Can you leave, please? _

Sure,_ Harry thought. _Just one more moment. I want to see if I can figure out what you're feeling, not just your mental conversation with me.

_Okay. _There was nothing for a split second. Then, he could perceive what Ron was feeling. His hand ached horribly, and felt numb. Also, he wanted to have a chocolate frog. Harry could feel his mate's discomfort at having his mind read, so he quickly stopped trying to read his mind.

But he was still there. Why couldn't he leave?

Harry's mind raced. How could he get out? Why was he still here? What about Hermione and Ginny? What do I look like right now? Did I faint or-

Harry was back. He sighed with relief. Ron let out his held breath too, apparently happy that Harry was out of his head.

"For a moment I thought you were stuck there, mate!" Ron said. "No offense, I'm glad you're out of my brain there. It wasn't very comfortable at all. Merlin, I feel sorry for you if this is what you had to deal with after Snape every Occlumency lesson…"

He groaned and held his hand to his forehead. Hermione asked him what hurt, and he said. "Splitting headache."

"Harry, why can you suddenly read minds? Doesn't this seem a bit… odd to you?" Hermione asked.

"I never could before, Hermione. I swear. And I won't do it again so forcefully with you guys. Sorry Ron. I didn't know what would happen."

"S'okay," Ron said simply.

"I can't help but think, Voldemort could read minds," Harry said. "He'd enter my thoughts at night."

"Perhaps he passed that on to you somehow," Ginny mused. "Seems a bit far out."

"Well, we do share a lot of qualities," Harry commented. "That scar bonded us in many ways. I am a Parseltongue, so is he. The sorting hat said I should be in Slytherin, where he was. Plus the whole 'only one can survive' kinda thing. Maybe giving me the scar gave me all those things and the ability to read minds."

"But why did it only show up now?" Hermione asked with a frown, as if she was trying to think of something. "Why not when you were younger?"

"I don't know."

No one spoke for a moment. Then, Harry spoke again.

"Well, since you're hungry, Ginny, and Ron wants a chocolate frog," he grinned sheepishly at Ron's surprised face. "Let's go to Diagon Alley!"

Their grins faded. "What's wrong?" Harry asked.

"You're supposed to stay here, Harry. To keep you safe," Ginny said sadly. "Diagon Alley would make you very vulnerable and easy to attack."

Harry groaned in frustration. "I don't want to stay here! I'd rather run the risk of getting attacked than stay cooped up here for a month!"

"Harry, we know you've been a man who wants action and doesn't like to sit around, but we need you to stay here. It's the safest place for you right now," Hermione said.

Suddenly, Harry remembered something Hagrid had said.

'_Ere's Gringotts. Safest place there is, except maybe Hogwarts, o' course._

Harry obviously didn't want to camp out in a vault at Gringotts, but Hogwarts! "How about Hogwarts? That's the safest place there is! And Ron and Hermione are there!"

Ron hesitated before answering Harry.

He sighed. "We were hoping you wouldn't think of that. Yes, Hogwarts would be even safer than St. Mungo's, but…" Ron broke off, nodding at Hermione or Ginny to continue.

"The students would probably swarm you. And the Slytherins might want to hurt you, Harry," Hermione said flatly.

"I'm not useless, you know!" Harry said with a hint of anger in his voice. "I can defend myself!"

"I doubt the Slytherins would try to pull anything on Harry. The Dark Days are over… there are even some Slytherins that have turned to the good side again, according to you yourself, Hermione," Ron said with a smirk, and Hermione blushed.

"Well, yes, I supposed I did, but-"

"Nevermind," Harry said coldly. "I think Ron is right. And if I do get hurt, I will take responsibility for it. It's not like you guys encouraged me to go to Hogwarts."

"Well, all right. Hermione, I think it's for the best," Ginny said.

"I suppose so," Hermione said, but Harry could tell she still wasn't sure.

"Alright, mate!" Ron cheered. "Want to leave tomorrow and head off to school?" he teased. "You got some real catching up to do!"

Harry realized something all of a sudden. "So, what happened, that last week of school, when I was… asleep?"

"We got let out the day after the battle. The school was without a headmaster, a Charms teacher, and a nurse. All the students were anxious to get home to their families, and teachers needed to time to repair and rebuild the school."

"Yes, Harry. Professor Flitwick was killed by a Death Eater in the battle. But Madame Pomfrey recovered later on," Ginny said.

"Oh." What else could Harry say? "I'm feeling a bit light-headed again, so do you think I could take a nap?"

"Fine with me!" Ron said grinning. "I could use one myself."

"Bye Harry! We'll come by tomorrow!" Hermione said.

"We'll be off to Hogwarts at noon," Ginny said with a wave.

Another woman appeared outside the hospital door. "Back to see me, Harry?" Anne remarked sarcastically. "I see you relapsed because you weren't doing your exercise routine, eh?"

Harry chuckled. "I didn't quite get to it, no."

"You really should. It'll do you good," she said seriously. "But, for now, just relax. You'll be out of here tomorrow."

"Thanks, Anne."

"Hey, I was sleeping! Could you two keep it down?" Ron retorted grumpily. Anne rolled her eyes and then exited the room with a wink.

Then Harry fell asleep dreaming about going back to Hogwarts once more.

---

Sorry, again, about taking my time to update. I'm writing another story now, Flight of a Dove, so things will be going a bit slower. If you have a moment, read and review my other story! It's a little bit short on reviews, lol. I know it's probably not as good as this story, but just read it anyway. Review this chappie too! Luv ya!

Kelsey


	11. Back to School?

If I Should Die Before I Wake

Chapter 10

Back to School?

_Disclaimer: I don't own any of it besides the plot._

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Hogwarts had hardly lost any brilliance over the years, Harry thought to himself as he studied the immense castle. In fact, it seems as if it had improved during the rebuilding stage after the great battle. An additional tower had been built, and the Astronomy tower looked less ancient than the rest of the castle.

The three of them walked toward the hospital wing. Madame Pomfrey smiled, as did another younger woman next to her.

"Welcome! This is Madame Bonnim, my assistant. I plan to retire at the end of this year, so I am teaching this young lady all I know so she can continue my work."

"Nice to meet you," Harry said politely.

"Okay, so here's the plan," Hermione said once they had finished their hellos with the two nurses. "You are going to sleep in here every night, since you aren't a professor, so you can't sleep in the professors' dorms. There is plenty of room in here for you. Hardly anyone gets hurt nowadays, but usually when it happens it's a Slytherin who hexed someone for fun. Or Quidditch. Stupid Slytherins."

Harry gaped at Hermione calling the Slytherins stupid. Of course that was normal for them to do when they were students of the school, but now that she was a teacher, Harry had expected her to be respectful when talking about her students.

Hermione smiled. "Yes, I know what you're thinking Harry. But I have no respect for the Slytherins at all whatsoever. Hardly anyone gets sorted into Slytherin anymore… they have about a quarter the number of students that the others houses have. You'd think they'd learn after the war was over, but some of them will never change. Did I ever mention that there was a huge resorting ceremony after the war?"

Harry shook his head. "How'd that go?"

"It was rather strange, I admit. Anyone who wanted to be resorted after the war was allowed to. Already, almost all of the 6thand 7th years in Slytherin had been caught supporting Voldemort's side during the final battle, so they were put in Azkaban and locked up for life. About half of the 3rd through 4th years were on the dark side as well, but they were too young to be put in Azkaban, so their wands were snapped and now they were banished to the Muggle world, to never use magic again. Their memories were modified as well."

"But what about their parents? Weren't they wizards, so they could remind them of their magical abilities?" Harry asked.

"You're not thinking, Harry," Hermione chided. "Usually students wouldn't turn to the dark side so young unless their parents were Death Eaters. So they had already been put in Azkaban, every single one of them that was left. Most of them just sort of… died in the final battle. Most of the Death Eaters, I mean."

"Oh," Harry said. "So how did the resorting work?"

"Oh yes. Professor McGonagall invited all of the Slytherins who wished to be resorted to come forward. She didn't say it bluntly, but she kept dropping hints about the dark side and not going up to the sorting stool if you weren't changed. That's basically what she meant," Hermione said.

About three-quarters of the Slytherins went up to get resorted. Sadly, some didn't understand the fact that you had to be 'changed.' Some just went because they wanted to be sorted into a House with their friends. I remember how sad McGonagall looked when 9 of those Slytherins got resorted back into Slytherin again."

"Onlyfive students got sorted into Slytherin this year. There werenine last year, and we weren't here before that. So that's that," Ron said shortly, trying to end the conversation.

"So you can see, Harry, why I despise the Slytherins so much," Hermione said, giving Ron a look. "Even Snape doesn't favor them as much anymore. For the ones who are in Slytherin, it is too late to turn them back to the good side."

"Yes, well, anyway…" Ron was obviously growing quite bored with the conversation at hand. "Usually we sleep in our dorm every night, and go back home on the weekends. But, now that you're here, we're going to bring our things in the hospital wing instead of our dorms so we can spend time with you, mate!" he said. "We can't go home now anyway. The house is still invaded by that accursed mist. Plus, you could get attacked while we were at Hogwarts or something."

Ron's attempt to steer the conversation clear of the Slytherins, which he had obviously heard one too many times from Hermione, actually worked this time. Harry decided to help him out before Hermione could interrupt.

"Well, I'm glad I'm here with you guys," Harry said. "Any chance I could go see Ginny sometime soon?" he said, blushing.

Ron grinned evilly. "Oh don't worry. If you set up a date with her I'm sure we could work things out."

"It's not a date!" Harry said, blushing deeper, his face suggesting otherwise. "It's just… I want to see her. I haven't seen her for a while because she works at the Ministry, not here."

"Hmm, the last time you saw her was what… less than a day ago?" Hermione asked with a wink. Harry turned an even deeper shade of red that didn't seem possible.

"Oh, stop tormenting him," Ron said to Hermione. "Sorry mate. It's just… you're perfect for each other."

"Umm, yeah…" Harry mumbled, then changed the subject. "Anything else you need to tell me? Or do you need to get off to class?"

"Oh, there's more," Hermione said grinning as Harry rolled his eyes and made to unpack his things. "Don't worry. We're informing you well."

Harry grimaced at the thought of Hermione 'informing him well'. His grimace deepened as he thought of the poor students in her Muggle Studies classes that had to listen to her 'informing them well' too. What torture. But he was sure that she was a great teacher.

"We figured you might get a bit bored just sitting around all day," Ron said. "I've mentioned this to the DADA teacher and he was more than okay with it. Would you like to team-teach the DADA classes with me? I'm sure you'd do great."

Harry thought about this. He'd always wanted to teach others to defend themselves, ever since fifth year when they start the DA to go against Professor Umbridge. This was definitely something that he wanted to do.

"Thanks, Ron. That'd be great!" Harry said enthusiastically.

"And maybe you could stop by my Muggle Studies class and help out. I mean, you lived with Muggles too for quite some time," Hermione said.

"Thanks, Hermione," Harry said, though he personally would rather go to DADA than Muggle Studies. "Maybe I can stop by the library if I can't get to your class. I'm sure the classes overlap each other, so I couldn't get to both every day."

"Oh, of course," Hermione said. "I'm in the library during lunch at noon, and the period after. During first period, both Ron and I have a free period, so we have breakfast together."

"I have more free periods than Hermione does," Ron explained, "becauseProfessor Murkwooddoesn't have me help him teach 6th and 7th years. I do better teaching younger students. Sometimes I grade 6th and 7th year exams, though."

"All right. You guys are confusing me! Just write down a couple schedules and give them to me, okay?" Harry exclaimed grinning.

They both agreed. Hermione checked the time.

"Oh dear. First periodstarted ten minutes ago, and I really need to come up with a lesson plan. Ron, don't you have those 5th year exams you said you had to grade?"

"Oh, yeah," Ron mumbled.

See you later, Harry!"

Ron cleared his throat loudly.

Hermione blushed. "You too Ron." She leaned in and gave him a quick kiss on the lips.

Ron turned around, his face slightly red, and spoke to Harry. "I should be going soon too, mate. Ol' professorMurkwood wants me to grade some short exams he had end of last week."

"All right. See you later," Harry said with a wave.

"Why don't you stop by at 9:40 to help out with the class? We're doing boggarts with the 3rd years," Ron said. "It'll be a great demonstration."

Harry smiled. "Okay. I'll stop by at around 9:30."

"See you then," Ron said, and left the hospital wing.

Harry sat on the bed, and after just sitting there for 5 minutes, he grew very bored. What was he supposed to do until he could stop by Ron and Hermione's classes?

He finally figured out that he could just stop by at the library for a while and do some reading. Sure, Hermione probably wouldn't be there, but it was better than sitting in the hospital wing forever. _So much for Ron and Hermione's free period,_ Harry thought. _They have to go and work anyway._

Suddenly a thought occurred to him. _Maybe they don't have to work,_ Harry thought. _They just wanted to ditch me,_ he thought miserably. _That's why Hermione gave Ron that wink as she walked out the door. _Then he brightened up slightly. _They're married, you dolt. You'd want to spend some time alone with Ginny, wouldn't you? _

_Yes._

_Being married to Ginny would be wonderful,_ Harry thought with a sigh. But he had hardly been able to see her since he woke up. He desperately wished he could see her now… go out to lunch or something like that. But for his safety, he was supposed to remain inside Hogwarts for at least a few days to start with.

Harry sighed. He was going crazy over Ginny. He needed to ask her out to lunch… or _something._ Anything so he could see her alone, and try to figure out if she still wanted to be with him. Since she wasn't trying to get him out of Hogwarts, she probably didn't want him. She wanted him to stay in Hogwarts away from her. _Stop thinking like that, Potter,_ Harry practically smacked himself. Don't jump to any conclusions.

But he couldn't help but think that way.

Suddenly a voice cut into his thoughts. "I've never seen someone so talented that they can read without their eyes moving across the page," Hermione said sarcastically. Her blouse was quite wrinkled, and her hair was more frizzed about than usual. Ron was right behind her, and his hair was askew in all directions. Harry suppressed a grin. It looked like they _had _had a good time.

"Oh, I wasn't exactly reading. Just… sitting. And thinking."

"Well, we decided to come keep you company. We have another thirty minutes to spare," Ron said.

Hermione grinned. "Unless, of course, you'd rather keep reading."

Harry smiled, and then put his hand over his mouth in mock horror. "Keep reading? Are you kidding me?"

They all laughed. "Listen, Harry, do you want to come teach the third years next period? I think it'd be a perfect day to do classes with me. The boggart will probably change into a dementor for you, and the seventh years are learning the Patronus charm!" Ron said. "Normally I wouldn't be teaching the seventh years but… well… maybe you could show them your Patronus or something."

"Okay!" Harry said enthusiastically. He loved creating his Patronus because it resembled his father so much. How he missed his father he hardly knew… and his mother, too. Anything that reminded him of them was welcoming, but sometimes depressing. In this case, it was more comforting than he could ever imagine.

"Earth to Harry," Hermione said, once again interrupting his thoughts. Harry muttered a quick sorry and then stood up.

"I think I'll go to DADA with Ron for a couple periods and then stop by your Muggle Studies, Hermione. Is that okay?" he asked.

"Sure, Harry. I'm sure you'd probably enjoy Defense more anyway," Hermione said. "But I do try my best to make the class interesting. Most students actually enjoy it a lot more than in the past. I let them experiment with Muggle objects like telephones and toasters and such."

Ron grimaced. "What?" Harry inquired.

"Ronald here burnt his hand when insisting he could figure out _on his own_ how to use a toaster," Hermione said with a wink.

"Okay, okay!" Ron said, turning red. "It's not like I'd ever used a toatser before."

"_Toaster_," both Harry and Hermione recited back at him.

"Whatever," Ron said, but Harry knew for a fact that he would make sure he remembered it next time. "This is the disadvantage of being best mates with two people who lived with Muggles."

"Yeah, yeah," Harry said. "But don't you feel sorry for me for having to live with Muggles like mine? Even if it does classify me as able to make fun of you?"

Ron nodded. "True, true," he said, mimicking Harry's repeating 'yeah yeah'.

Hermione burst into laughter. The two men looked at her. "Oh nothing, oh nothing," she said before she started giggling again.

"Stop that!" Harry said.

"Stop that!" Ron added.

Harry glared at Ron. "Okay I've had enough of this."

"Okay I've h-"

"As have I!" Hermione cut in before Ron could finish. The trio chortled slightly, for some students had entered the library, and drawing attention to Harry Potter would be a bad thing. By the end of the day, surely everyone would know that Harry was in the school.

Harry read the silence correctly. "They're going to find out eventually," he said softly. "Might as well get it over with all at once. D'you want to announce it to the whole school at lunch? Would that work?"

"I guess so," Hermione said nervously.

Ron glared at her. "Yes Hermione. It will work," he said firmly.

"What are you two on about?" Harry asked.

"Well, Harry," Hermione explained, "If the school finds out, some Slytherins could tip off someone, who could tip off someone else, who could tip off… well, you get the point. Eventually, that news could get to Peter Pettigrew!"

"It's not like he won't find out without help either. He's going to know soon enough," Harry argued. He looked to Ron for support.

"Hermione, Harry's right. If you don't want any guilt on your conscience if Pettigrew finds out, then I'll make the announcement, okay?" Ron said.

"Well, all right," Hermione caved. "We'd better get back to class."

"Want to come to Defense with me, Harry?" Ron asked. "I'll introduce you to Professor Murkwood."

"Of course," Harry said, standing up. "I'll see you, Hermione."

"See you later," she said, and exited the library.

"Lead on," Harry said to Ron.

With an extravagant gesture, Ron opened the door to Harry and they were off to the Defense classroom.

_When I enter that classroom, the class will know that Harry Potter is not only awake, but is staying at Hogwarts. At noon, everyone will know. I'm tired of hiding the truth. I'm ready to live again._

Harry looked through the door and into the classroom that wasfilled withthird years. It was time.

---

I know this chapter didn't have much action, but I wanted some content of Harry at Hogwarts. The next chapter will probably be like this too, but a bit different. We'll see where this story is going. Please review!

Kelsey


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